Chapter 19: Big and NastyK eyed me curiously. “Is there a problem, Mr Saunders?”

  My aim never wavered. “You tell me, K.”

  She stood framed in the light from the bathroom, dressed in funal grey cotton panties and bra. She carried her pistol low. With careful, deliberate steps I slowly circled towards the bed. I couldn’t stand long, not dressed in this goddamn lingerie, perched precariously on impossible heels.

  “Would you like me to put up my hands?” K asked.

  “I’d like to know what the fuck is going on, is what I’d like.” I settled on the edge of the bed. My head ounding. Lack of sleep. The stress. dy. Tim and that Agent Fuy. The booze wasn’t helping. Now K. I felt like I was going to lose it. Not a good time to be holding a firearm. “But you start by putting the gun down. Slowly.”

  K did as ordered, engaging the safety before croug and leaving the on on the floor. She looked up at me inquisitively. “And now?”

  “Over there,” I anded. I gestured with the gun for her to step towards the er. She moved slowly, eying me cautiously. Fiftee between us. The room was only dimly lit by the dles and the light snting in from the bathroom, and the little that slipped through the curtains from outside. K’s face, shrouded in shadows, revealed nothing. heless, I felt rather than saw the sudden tensing of her body.

  My arm with the gun saut. “Don’t even think about it, K.”

  She rexed and raised her hands to pcate me. “Very well.” She backed up against the wall and slid to the floor, shifting to find a fortable position. Her eyes never left the on in my hand. “There. Satisfied?”

  I gave a curt nod.

  “Are you going to shoot me, Mr Saunders?”

  “That’s up to you.”

  “Are you capable of shooting me, Mr Saunders?”

  I gave a grim chuckle. “Don’t you doubt it for a sed, K.” She probably didn’t believe me. I wouldn’t hesitate to prove her wrong. I liked proving people wrong. “So don’t push me.” I pressed the palm of my free hand against my temple. God, my head felt like it was going to explode.

  “You don’t look well, dy.”

  “Don’t call me that,” I growled. “The name’s David.”

  She nodded. “Very well, David. David, you don’t look well.”

  I gave a bark of ughter. “Yeah, no shit.”

  “I thought you trusted me. Why the gun?”

  “Yeah, funny that. I’ve been trusting you, K, since I first came to you for help. Remember that? Yeah. And I was impressed, K. I really was. You struck me as very petent. I’m not a big fan of authority figures but you had me thinking differently, see? After all, I know fug Steele isn’t an easy man to go up against . . . I didn’t think I’d find much help. Helping me had to seem a risky proposition.”

  It’d been ages since I’d st held a gun. I gave it an expert little twirl and s ba at K. Just like riding a bike. “But not too risky for you, eh, K? You sure stepped up to the pte awfully quick.”

  She watched me from the er impassively. “And your point is, David?”

  “I’m here because I had nothing to lose. I’m here because it was the right thing to do. But why are you here, K?”

  She didn’t answer me.

  “I’m waiting, K.”

  “Your wait will be a long one.”

  “I’ve got the gun.”

  She shrugged. “Then shoot me, Mr Saunders.” She stood up, one hand against the wall. “Though I suggest you use a pillow to muffle the shot, unless you want those authorities you so distrust to return.”

  “Maybe I do.” I kept the gun trained on her, a little annoyed by her ck of . She left the er a about blowing out the dles she had quickly spread out to create a faux romantic atmosphere. She kept her distahough. “Why should you care, anyway?”

  “I promised you I would do everything in my power to keep you alive. I have every iion of keeping that promise.”

  “Even though I’m pointing a gun at you.”

  “Yes.”

  “You sure that’s the only reason?”

  “Yes.”

  “Because, you know, it’s you they’re looking for.”

  Holding one of the dles in her hand, she gnced aside at me from the other side of the room. Her eyes glittered coolly over the dang fme. “So you said.” She blew the dle out. “Is that why you have stopped trusting me?”

  The on remairained on her as she moved about the room. K was ing. She was actually ing up even though I had this goddamn gun.

  “Who says I don’t trust you?” I answered with a wry smile. “I’m just w why they had a picture of you, K. They were going door to door looking for you. Not David Saunders. Not dy Belmy. You. So, yeah, it kinda got me questioning things. Things like: why the hell are special agents hunting down one of their own?

  “And it’s got me w about all this.” My gun made a wide sweep ay lingerie-, these fake tits, that--I didn’t even want to think about it--thing glued to my crotbsp; “ly standard gear for the witness prote program, I’m thinking. Eh? Cutting edge high-tech kit? How did you put it? ‘Unreleased on the open market?’ So how the hell did you get it, huh?” My free hand roughly grabbed and squeezed one of those jugs through the sheer fabric of the merrywidow. “Even if you could buy it, something like this is gotta be pricey. I’m guessing it’s all a bit outside the normal operating cost of the program.”

  K stared at me from across the room for what felt like a long time. The ache in my head was slowly gathering into a single, blistering pain behind my right eye. God, I wao get out of these clothes. Those sleraps ay shoulders were distrag me something awful, and the ungodly arch of the shoes was killing me. Yeah, you could say I felt more than a little uled, dressed up like some Pyboy funy.

  “Do you mind if I sit?” K asked, pulling the chair out from beh the writing desk.

  “Yeah, whatever,” I said, twitg the gun to show sent.

  When was the st time I’d held a gun? I wondered. At least five years. A little bit longer. That favour Caleb called in, that nightmare bullshit Bckwater Phoenix op he wanted help with. God. That long ago? Suddenly, the past five years of dder-climbing, of corporate minioude seemed surreal, dreamlike, impossible.

  Impossible? How about the here and now: sitting at the edge of bed, ensced in virgin-white nylon and ce, covered and pressed by straps and stretch fabric that caressed every part of my body, over shoulders and thighs, around my bad ay ass. Dressed in lingerie with an ugly grey Steyr settled fortably in my hand. Fiftee away sat K, also half naked, looking utterly uned by the fact there was a firearm poi her chest.

  My head throbbed so painfully it made the gun tremble in my grip. Shit. There was too much going on. Swarming around in my head. Anger and uain thoughts and painful memories. A string of women from my past: Amanda Lang and Akiko Takahashi and Muna Khalid. Sakura and Persephone. dy.

  And Special Agent Katherine Smith. Motherfug K. The thought that she might have betrayed me was killing me. It really was. I’ve already said I make my mind up about people quickly. No sed ces. I’ve been screwed over often enough in the past not to have learned my lesson. That’s why I follow my gut feeling. My instincts usually have a better idea of what’s going on than my head does. God, my head--it felt like it litting in two.

  My instincts told me that I could trust K, just as they told me there was something slimy and terrible about Agent Fosters. He’d been a det-looking guy, medium build and probably in his mid-thirties. Slick suit and professioerior. A--my gut told me not to trust the guy, not to fuck with him. He left me feeling . . . scared, and I don’t scare easily.

  Then again, I’m not sure I would’ve felt safe around any guy, dressed the way dy was. That badge Fosters fshed me looked legit enough, as far as I tell that kind of thing. Typical private security forces deputised by the State to handle domestical affairs; normal enough, but also ing… for a case this high-profile, I’d expect the govero stick with internal agehere was a whiff of corporate influence—of Steele—to Agent Fosters and Abimbo.

  But that picture. K. Those agents were deputised to find her—not me. Those weren’t Jeremiah fug Steele’s hitmen tailing us all day, but rather federal-employed agents. Which had me thinking very unpleasant thoughts.

  What if K was actually w for that bastard Steele?

  She watched me from across the room. Her eyes kept dang away.

  “Having trouble looking at me, K? Feeling guilty?”

  She gave a polite cough. “Actually, I was hoping you would . . . sit a little more demurely. The view is more than a little distrag.”

  Blushing angrily, I crossed my legs at the thigh, hiding that impossible fake vagiled between my legs. With a sibint whisper the gowled around my waist a my stog-cd leg exposed. It roving remarkably difficult to maintain the aggressive posture, dressed as I was.

  “Better?” I demanded.

  “Much.”

  “Then how about some answers?”

  K shrugged. “I would have happily answered them at any time, whether you had a gun or not.” She paused for a moment, as if she expected me to lower my firearm. I didn’t.

  “You are correct, of course. Prosthetics such as the ones you currently wear are not only avaible for witness relocation. Then again, the program is not only involved in the process of disguising its partits as members of the opposite sex.”

  I snorted. “Yeah, I’m sure.” I gave my right tit a squeeze. “So where the hell did this shit e from, then?”

  “The easy answer, Mr Saunders, is that they came from your former employers. An R&D branch of Nerew the first geion of these a little over two years ago, near as we tell. The project was distinued o was discovered that the product was not eically viable. We believe they were inally intended for mastey patients, but that the cost of growing the breasts far exceeded what most women could afford to pay for them. Furthermore, the breasts themselves proved unstable.”

  “Unstable?” My already high-pitched voice jumped a notbsp; I suddenly regretted groping the thing shly. “They’re not gonna . . . explode, are they?”

  K ughed. “No, Mr Saunders. Unstable in that the pound used to form the breast has an unfortunately short lifespan. Though it draws a certain amount of its nutrients directly from your body to remain ‘alive’, it heless begins to wither and die after a few weeks. Much like fruit, actually.”

  Holy shit. I really did have melons stuy chest.

  “But . . . how do they work? I mean, I feel them, K. When I touch the damn things, I feel it--not down against my real chest, but out here,” I grabbed myself again, though this time gently, “as if they really were a part of me.” Strictly speaking that wasn’t true. The sensation of my own touch was muted, as if diffused by distance or a protective yer. The nipples themselves did nothing for me, but then again, my real nipples doher.

  K shrugged. “I am not a stist, Mr Saunders. The patents are held by NeoPharm’s subsidiary. Some of the boys ba the b tried to reverse-engineer a sample ahey could e up with, the breasts are grown from a fungal medium along a cellulose membrane, using some kind of semi-anipound that intelligently bonds with the patient. You feel it, Mr Saunders, because teically speaking, they are part of you.”

  “Whoa!” I excimed. “What the hell do you mean, intelligently?”

  “Intelligent, Mr Saunders. Not se. Perhaps adaptive would have been a better choice of words.”

  “I don’t like the sound of that, K. I’ve seen those movies--you know, the ones where someos a heart transpnt or something and goes crazy? These tits, they’re not gonna try and take over my brain, are they?”

  She smiled. “I believe your brain is as safe from those breasts as any man’s is.”

  I didn’t like having those things there. Though she didn’t say it ht, they still sounded like parasites to me. They hung and fed off my body and ultimately gave back absolutely fuck all. “And . . . this thing?” I made a vague gesture meant to take in the vagina cmped down over my cod balls.

  “Simir teology, Mr Saunders, though necessarily somewhat more plicated.”

  “It’s going to wither and die, too?”

  She nodded.

  “It’s not gonna take my dick with it, is it?”

  Again she ughed. “No, Mr Saunders. Again, I am not a stist but assure you that your male ans are perfectly safe, if somewhat tightly restrained. Your testicles are held ba their natural cavity and your penis is tained in an anic sheath. In fact, the b believes the deviaturally produces a topical ahetic which serves to eliminate any pain and minimize, ah, ued bulges from arising.

  “Even urination should not be a problem, though of course you will have to sit like any other woman.”

  “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

  K never kids. So as long as this goddamn thing was stue I was going to be oep closer to dy--a huge step, if you ask me, and one I wasn’t too happy about. I love pissing standing up. I mean, I really do. Drunkenly writing your name in the snow; standing and pissing against the way; avoiding line-ups at the toilets at a club: these are the great ianasity.

  “Why the hell would somebody grow fake vaginas, K?” I demanded. “I get the tits. Sort of. But cutting-edge ts?”

  She wi my nguage. I reminded myself to try and to down a bit. “I do not know precisely,” she answered. “More women than you know suffer beh the fist of oppressive regimes, David. Genital mutition . . . young girl having their clitoris scraped or burnt off . . . and worse.”

  I swallowed unfortably at the thought. “I hadn’t thought of that.”

  “Most people do not,” K answered. “Suen may have use for such products. Or those suffering from acts. Transgender patients, too, of course; a decade ago there was a real push towards developieologies to support transitioning patients. Otherwise, of course, the market for such things is obviously rather . . . limited. However. . . .” K hesitated, and then seemed to ge her mind.

  “, K. Spill it.”

  “You have to uand that these were seized goods,” she said. “Less than a month ago, ag on information supplied by an informant, agents raided a medical ic thought to be involved in the distribution of a number of illegal substances.”

  “Drugs?” I don’t like drugs. I mean, yeah, I’ve smoked a spliff or two in my life, especially as a teen, popped a couple pills out at the club, but I’d also seen the really nasty side of the trade. I’d lost more than one good friend to that shit.

  “Far worse than that,” K answered, and her voice turned uedly grim. “What we fouh that ic, David, was . . . evil. I wish I could think of a less melodramatic term, but what we found was beyond anything I have ever seen.”

  The way she said it actually sent a small shiver down my spine. Intrigue was overing paranoia; the on in my hand slowly drooped as I listeo K. “What do you mean?”

  Her eyes fshed coldly. “That is none of your business, Mr. Saunders.”

  I poi my newfound furry patbsp; “It became my busihe moment you attached these goddamn appliao me, K.”

  “Those?” She gave a humourless chuckle. “Those were the least of what we found in the raid.” By this time the gun was resting in my p, though I hadn’t pulled my finger away from the trigger. Though my i was captured, she hadly renewed my plete trust. “Though we found enough NeoPharm products being put to use to arouse our suspi.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You are not the first man,” K answered, “To be unwillingly fitted with a pair of artificial breasts, Mr Saunders.”

  I couldn’t keep myself from gng down at those firm pale orbs hanging off my chest, barely tained within their cy cups. Stupid rooky mistake, looking away like that.

  K could’ve crossed the room and pnted her foot in my face by the time I looked up again. She was certainly good enough. I don’t know why I believed that. It’s not like I’ve seen her a. But there’s a erson carries themselves, ohey’re no longer afraid. That Agent Fuy moved in the same way, e to think of it. And so does K. She knew she could take care of herself. Suddenly, even though I had the gun and she was sitting half-naked across the room from me, I had this feeling that I was the one in dahat if I didn’t ask or ahe right questions bad things might happen.

  She didn’t move, though. She seemed tent to talk from across the room. “Ultimately, what we found was evidence possibly linking Mr Steele to the site we raided. There were not just NeoPharm products. Other items produced through Steele-owned subsidiaries were on site as well. Not ordinary things. Newly-developed, cutting-edge, unreleased. Very high tebsp; Illegal. Expensive.”

  “What the hell are you talking about? What does this have to do with me?”

  “The operation was discovered roughly two months ago.”

  The pounding in my head subsided, but only because of a far worse sinking feeling in my stomabsp; “But that’s around when I. . . .”

  “Not around, Mr. Saunders. Precisely. The night of. The very night you saw Mr Steele kill Mr Antazzi, I took part in an atta a very well-defended bck site medical facility that--”

  “But I didn’t hear or see anything about--”

  “He believes you did. He believes you prove his e to . . . to . . . .” Her voice died, strangled beh repressed emotion. Her hands briefly shook by her side. It was the stroional rea I’d ever seen from her.

  When she found her voice agaione was bleak. “He will stop at nothing to have you removed, Mr Saunders. I was relut to reveal the full extent of the danger you have submitted yourself to, but now there is little choice.”

  I cocked my head towards the door. “Agent Fosters? The woman?” Strange, but I’d almost fotten about the woman.

  If her voice was cold before, it ositively gcial now. “The day after the event,” K told me, “three undercents involved in the raid turned up dead. Within a week four more colleagues were killed as well. My partner was killed.”

  What do you say to that kind of thing? “I’m sorry.”

  “There was an attempt on my life as well.” Her smile was thin and cruel. “Obviously it did not succeed.”

  “So you think those two are bad news?”

  “I do not know. But I discovered the hard way that the arm of Jeremiah Steele reaches very far and very deep. The very agency you turo for proter Saunders, would have likely proved your undoing.”

  “Huh.” Damn, but I kurning to the feds was a bad idea. The authorities always mao muck things up. I was really starting tret starting this whole thing, I tell you. Why the hell couldn’t I have kept my diyself? If I hadn’t been chasing pussy that night, I wouldn’t have one of my ht now.

  Though what K had told me really caught my attention. What the hell did she stumble across in that medical facility? I knew I’d gotten mixed up in bad shit when I saw fug Steele whack that Italian dude, and the other stuff I saw was just dht wrong, but . . . this? How big a shitpile had I nded in?

  The funny thing is, you’d think knowing that I’d just stepped into something way over my head would’ve made me feel worse. But I didn’t feel like I was drowning in it at all. Hell, I think the dull throb in my head even pulled back a bit. Yeah, I was totally fucked . . . but there was also a part of me--a part I’d forcefully buried away and tried tet--that thrilled at the idea of being swept up in something big and nasty. I ushing forty and all this crazy spy-shit had me feeling young again.

  My thoughts were interrupted by a soft knock at the door.

  I so attention, swinging the Steyr towards the disturbanbsp; I gnced back at K a moment ter. Where the hell did that gun in her hand e from? She swiftly padded across the room towards the beds. She nodded oowards the door.

  With wobbly steps I approached the door, on held at the ready. “Yes?” I called out, and the nervous tremor wasirely forced.

  “dy?”

  “Tim?” I gnced back at K. She shrugged and faded bato the darkness at the far end of the room. I opehe door as far as the log allowed. “What are you doing here?”

  “I . . . just had to check if everything was okay.” I dropped the handgun behind the door. Stupid kid. He stood there i outdhts, with such etched into his face that I could’ve almost ughed. I think the idiot was actually crushing on me. Not that I could bme him, really. dy retty hot stuff. At the moment he could only see my face, half cealed in darkness, peeking around the door: a mask of heavy makeup and shiny lips. I gave him a nice, wet smile and decided he deserved a treat. He’d probably saved my life tonight.

  “That’s so sweet,” I said, opening the door.

  Whatever answer he had died in his throat. The light from the bathroom caught me from behind, highlighting those feminine curves, casg through the shimmering fabric draped ay body. I leaned against the doorframe with my arm crossed beh those silk-cd parasites.

  Tim didn’t quite seem to know what to say or do. He looked away, blushing fiercely. Poor kid. “Um . . . those cops, they’re gone now.”

  “I know,” I answered.

  “You’re not here with your aunt, are you?” He sounded angry. I watched the realization slowly work its way across his face, a sorry for him. I think he was g in that most girls don’t dress up like lingerie models when staying with family.

  I gave a sad shake of my head. “No Tim, I’m not.”

  When he looked back at me, his angry eyes stayed fixed on my green ones. The kid had some css, I had to admit. He wasn’t staring at those tits or anything; he was actually looking at me. “I ’t believe you pyed me like that.”

  “Tim, I didn’t.” I tried to sound as genuine as possible. “I really didn’t. I meant what I said, you know. You really are a nice guy.”

  He snorted bitterly and looked away again. “Yeah, I know.”

  I sighed softly. “Tim, that’s not a bad thing.”

  “Whatever. Just . . . just make sure you’re out by nine, okay?”

  He was about to leave and I should’ve just left it at that. I really should have. But for some reason I called out to him. “No wait, Tim . . . please.”

  The boy hesitated. Of course he did. A sexy young woman was calling his name.

  “What?”

  “Tim. I just wao let you know. If I wasn’t already with someone? I totally would’ve had that drink with you.”

  “Yeah?” He finally looked back at me, smiliively. “Really?”

  “Really,” I said. And then . . . .

  With a delicate step I moved up against him. I was taller than him in the heels, though only just. I liked that. There was an ued tingle as my breast fttened against his chest. One hand cupped his cheek and ran through his short spiky hair and slowly pulled him towards me. He didn’t resist. I leaned forward. My lips gently found his. The kiss was soft and sweet and just a bit sticky from the lipgloss. I sighed through slightly parted lips. “Thank you,” I purred, and pulled away.

  Tim stood there for a moment, eyes unfocused. “Nobody’s gonna believe me when I tell ‘em,” he mumbled. “My first freakin’ kiss and she’s a total babe and nobody’s gonna believe me.”

  I forced a giggle. “Good-night, Tim.”

  “Uh . . . yeah.”

  I closed and locked the door and released a deep breath. The pain in my head eased off. I didn’t feel siymore; quite the trary. The tension through my shoulders slowly bled away. After everything that happeonight, kissing that boy seemed almost easy.

  During the brief exge with Tim I’d made my decision. I looked down at the gun on the floor aantly picked it up.

  I heard K stir from the far side of the room. “Do we return to our standoff now, Mr Saunders?”

  “Call me dy,” I said. I cleared the round from the chamber, ehe safety and released the clip. With a shrug I gingerly stepped back towards the bed. “Way I see it, K, I’ve got two choices here: I either trust you, or not trust you. And I’ll be ho. A lot of shit doesn’t add up. Nobody travels with prosthetic boobs and pussies or this much clothing that just happens to fit me. And you seem to be pag enough heat to fight a small war.

  “So, you’ve got all this gear and you’ve clearly got back up sending out anonymous drone deliveries and there’s all sorts of stuff going on in the background that you haven’t told me about. At the same time you say the feds are looking for you and ’t be trusted and we’re w alone. It’s all a bit overwhelming, although when you get down to it, I’ve also got no reason to believe anything you say to me.”

  I held the Steyr out trip forward. “Like I said, there’s a lot about you that doesn’t add up. But you know what? My gut tells me you’re okay.”

  She came up to me and pulled the gun from my hand. Her eyes glinted enigmatically in the half-light.

  “Does that mean you trust me again, dy?” Her voice was surprisingly soft.

  I shrugged and smiled. “Yeah, I guess I do.”

  She stepped away and stored the firearm ba the case by the bed. “What did the boy want?”

  I absently touched one fio my lip. “To see if dy was okay.”

  “Was she?”

  “Yeah. Yeah, I guess I am.”

  ***

  Author's Notes: If you're impatient to read on, you find ter chapters at FM S. You also find everything up to Book 3, Chapter 6 avaible on Patreon: patreon./fakeminsk, as well as fanart and a few side projects.