Ch 27
Traveling upstream with the 12 new followers proved to be far more annoying than even Matt had anticipated. Whether it was due to the darkness making everything more difficult, the increased number of variables that came with having more people, or the fact that Greg didn’t know how to be quiet, Matt was definitely leaning toward it being Greg more than anything else. The guy seemed to have a compulsive need to talk incessantly. It made Matt wonder how Greg had ever managed to survive as someone isolated from society. Even if Matt could tell that it was precisely because Greg couldn’t take a hint that likely made others avoid him.
Still, somehow, they arrived at the point where Matt and the six women had camped the night before the goblin raid, after three arduous hours of walking. From there, Matt knew where they were, and he called for them to pick up the pace. Despite some complaints, they complied. This was mainly because they now actually believed that Matt knew where they were going, and sure enough, just before sunrise, the group arrived at the spot where the six women were dug in.
At that point, Matt called for the others to stay back as he moved forward, greeted by a worried Emily who looked utterly exhausted. It was clear that she had ended up on watch by herself, and Matt internally questioned why. Still, as he saw her come running out to hug him, he held his questions back, forcing himself to accept the embrace as she all but broke down sobbing.
“I knew you wouldn’t abandon us, sob, I knew it,” she said, her voice trembling.
“Calm down, has something happened since I left?” Matt asked gently.
“No, just talking, as Maria kept saying that you had run away from all of us. I knew she was wrong, but when you didn’t come back by the time it was my watch, I, I, I—” Emily stammered.
“Emily, it’s fine. I just ran into some complications and got lost for a bit. Now we need to wake up the others as there are a few decisions to be made,” Matt reassured her.
“Right, who are these people with you?” Emily inquired, glancing at the new group.
“They were camped downstream from us. Beyond that, I don’t want to constantly repeat myself, so let’s wake up the others,” Matt replied, eager to move forward with his plans.
Emily paused as if she still had something to say, but she held back and turned to join the others who were sleeping. Quietly and methodically, she woke each person—starting with Eleanor and ending with Maria. Not everyone stirred easily, yet within just over ten minutes, they were all awake and aware that Matt had returned and brought additional people with him.
"It’s good to see you made it back safely, but what took you so long?" Eleanor asked before anyone else could speak, her tone edged with concern.
"I got lost," admitted Matt. "Thankfully, everything eventually worked out. I’ll explain more later, but right now, there are other pressing matters to address."
"Are you talking about the group that accompanied you?" Eleanor inquired.
"Yes—the guy with the widow’s peak is their leader—and—" Matt began.
"Just tell me what deal you made with them," she interrupted.
"I told them they must either accept you as leader and merge our groups, or they could part ways with us."
"Great. And what exactly did you say to convince them that I’d be an effective leader?"
"I simply mentioned that you have management experience from before…" Matt replied, then went on to detail what he believed he had conveyed. He admitted, however, that he was hurrying and exhausted, and wasn’t certain he had communicated everything correctly.
By the end of his explanation, Eleanor’s face appeared as if she were suffering from a headache. "Have you ever considered that perhaps I was hoping to find someone who could become a better leader than me?" she remarked bitterly.
"I’m not offering you that option. My deal is with you. If you’re not willing to lead, then I’ll likely take Zara, Emily, and Yumiko with me—focusing on leveling up and avoiding being overrun as the rest join the other group."
"You assume that those three will follow you. Sure, Zara might, but you may find the other two more hesitant. Besides, Zara might expect something different from you at that point."
"Let’s hope we never need to find out, alright?" Matt replied, his tone laced with a hint of exasperation.
"Yes, I agree it’s best not to test that theory. Now come with me—I need to speak with their leader. Did you really not learn his name at any point?" Eleanor asked as they prepared to move.
"Steve. His name is Steve, but act as if I don’t know it—I take pride in not knowing these things."
"You really shouldn’t do that. Alright, one more thing before I go see him, and it’s important: What do you want out of the relationships you build with those of us you’re leaving behind when you exit this world?"
Matt paused, mulling over Eleanor’s question—an idea he had never really considered before. He remained silent, knowing that any response now might render all his careful efforts meaningless. Yet he wondered silently just how much he could expect, given that their new world would likely force them to spend more time apart than together. After what felt like an eternity, he finally spoke.
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"There are too many unknowns about what life on Earth will be like when we return for me to expect or desire much. If I had to choose one thing, it would be earning the trust of anyone we run into down the line."
"Fair enough," Eleanor replied, her voice thoughtful. "But what do you think you’ll need to do before you leave us to feel like you’ve truly earned that trust?"
"I don’t understand what you're asking," Matt shot back. "Why should I do more than what I’m already doing?"
"Matt," Eleanor said, her tone both gentle and firm, "when you disappear, it will feel as if you're abandoning us. No matter what you do, that feeling won't change. And if you continue being the only one who stands out like you do now, it will only worsen things."
"It’s not my fault others don’t—"
"Choose four others to follow you, ones who will remain behind. Bring them along, even if they protest with kicking and screaming, because they need to be ready to fill the void your departure would create."
"How bad did it get when I didn’t come back?" he asked, his voice tinged with worry.
"Maria really got under most of our skins," Eleanor recalled with a rueful smile. "It was probably just because we were already in a less-than-optimal mood, still recovering from whatever the goblins did to us, but it forced me to rethink my opinions of you."
"And what are your thoughts?" Matt pressed.
"Honestly, if you could find it within yourself to let others in, you'd easily unite many behind your banner," she admitted.
"What?" Matt murmured, clearly perplexed.
"You’re inherently reliable," Eleanor explained. "When it really counts, you always come to the rescue of those within your reach."
"In case I haven’t made it clear before, I would have had no problem letting you all fall to the goblins. I just refuse to stand by and watch as they capture you to be used as, well you know," Matt declared.
"I choose not to believe that," Eleanor countered. "I still think that the moment we started to lose—and the moment you saw an opening to attack the goblins—things would have turned out exactly as they did."
"What are you getting at?" Matt demanded.
"Your instinct is to shoulder everything alone," Eleanor observed. "You need to let others share some of the burden."
"Alright," Matt conceded with a pragmatic nod. "If this other group joins us, I'll consider forming a team of six, including myself, before pushing hard for level nine."
"Let me guess—one of them has caught your eye to come with you?" Eleanor inquired.
"Yeah, he’s annoyingly persistent," Matt admitted with a wry smile. "But Greg, the one trying to build a harem, has volunteered to join. Although he doesn't know that yet."
"There's a lot to unpack there," Eleanor remarked.
"Just warn the others about him and let them know he’s my current pick to come along," Matt instructed.
"Are you trying to get him killed?" Eleanor teased.
"No," Matt replied firmly, "but if he can’t survive, then he wasn’t a good pick in the first place."
"You're practically relishing the idea that he’s going to be hated by all of us," Eleanor chided.
"I’m not sure I follow," Matt said, feigning innocence. "Why would any of you hate him?"
Eleanor didn't dignify Matt with a response as she shook her head and gestured for him to follow her toward Steve. Once they reached him, she wasted no time in exposing Matt for knowing Steve's name as she initiated negotiations. Although Matt wanted nothing more than to slip away and catch a nap, it was evident that wasn't an option until the current situation was resolved. Matters were further complicated when Steve revealed Matt had informed them about the goblin threat evolving into a stampede of goblin women. This revelation forced Matt to recount his journey to the goblin settlement for a half-hour.
By the time Matt finished detailing his escape and the grim fate of any man or woman captured by the goblins, a heavy silence had fallen over both leaders. Matt, too exhausted to notice, missed the silent but mutual agreement between them to make things work and seek out additional groups to ally with. Meanwhile, Matt regarded the situation as merely an annoyance, believing that if the goblin women moved as a single group, they would be easy to outrun. Plus if they spread out, he felt confident in his ability to fight them off.
After sharing the news, Elenor advised him to get a few hours of sleep, and Steve passed along the same message to his group. Both leaders figured that they would soon be on the run, and everyone needed to be at least partially rested for what lay ahead. However, before Matt had a chance to curl up on the ground for a nap, Zara appeared in front of him, arms crossed and a frown etched on her face. Feeling the need to avoid further provoking her, Matt decided to engage with her, a mistake born of his exhaustion.
"What did I do now?" he asked reluctantly.
Seeing the slight, ironic smile on Zara's face, he knew he had already messed up. "Oh, nothing—just having you wander off on your own again made all of us worry that you might have died," she retorted coolly.
"I told you I'd be late," Matt mumbled, defensive.
"You also said you'd find dinner, and dinner came and went with nothing to show for it," Zara countered.
"I did bring back dinner. There are two boars to be split—"
"That's going to be breakfast," Zara interrupted firmly.
Frustration bubbled in Matt. "What do you want?"
"An apology, and for you to agree to let me be part of the group that is assigned to search for other survivors under your command."
"What makes you think that—?"
"Eleanor and I talked a lot while you were gone," Zara explained with measured intensity. "We were planning to start looking for others as a whole group tomorrow. But now that you've brought back another group, I’m convinced that you and three or four others will be sent out to search starting tomorrow."
"The day after tomorrow," Matt corrected her, rubbing his eyes with lingering fatigue. "But fine—let me get some sleep. We've got a lot to do in just a few hours."
"Only if you agree to let me come with you," Zara insisted.
"No, I don’t care what you want. I’m not taking a woman with me," Matt stated bluntly.
"That’s sexist," she shot back.
"I don't care. I'm well aware of who I am, and if I took a woman with me, things would end badly," he replied stubbornly.
"You're just scared you'll catch feelings," Zara said softly, her tone half teasing, half frustrated.
"Feelings of irritation and anger, maybe. Look, I’m not exactly relationship material, and I know that’s what you’re angling for," Matt retorted.
"You're really dense. Sure, I see that as a strong possibility if we survive long enough to return to earth and sort through all this mess. No, what I'm after is becoming strong enough that I won't need anyone's protection," Zara admitted. Then, with a more vulnerable tone, she added, "Matt, I'm a rape survivor, and you're the first single, straight guy I've talked to in a long time whom I haven't wanted to castrate. So excuse me for feeling like maybe, just maybe, I've finally found someone worth chasing."
"Your desires are unrequited—I want—" Matt began, but Zara cut him off.
"I know they’re unrequited, and that's part of why I feel the way I do. The other part is because I believe you would have stepped in when others wouldn’t have in my situation."
After saying that, Zara blushed slightly. Then, with a sudden turn, she started walking away. "Now go get your rest," she said over her shoulder.
Shaking his head, Matt succumbed to his exhaustion and lay down to sleep. Yet, as his eyelids grew heavy, he couldn’t help but linger on the expression Zara had worn just before leaving—something in her look that was both enigmatic and unplaceable. As consciousness slipped away, that compelling detail stayed with him, weaving itself into his dreams of the uncertain hours ahead.
