Elsewhere in Port Mesere, Orryn was on the hunt. Normally one wouldn’t conduct interviews with ordinary citizens in the middle of the night, but thanks to the number of residents who’d been kicked out of their homes the cafés and shops were open late to take advantage of the irritated and anxious. It was also a prime time to listen in on gossip, a comically easy feat for one such as he.

  It was also fun, getting involved in peoples’ private business. Interacting with them, figuring out all their little juicy tidbits was just so satisfying. Plus it gave him a chance to vent about his own workplace frustrations, share gossip, and socialize however else he wanted in ways that would be irresponsibly reckless on the divine streets of Yu-Shan. It’d been a decade since he last visited the food stalls outside the Crimson Panoply of Victory due to carelessly indulging in a vent about one of Shogun Hu Dai Liang’s feckless nephews. He could still taste the ambrosia churros from one of Swooping Heron’s nephews…or nieces? It could be hard to tell with gods.

  Pinto might also have been the wrong island to start with. Nobody was familiar with the Hibiki family, or of anyone named Ryoga. Perhaps it was silly to think it would be easy, that he’d find his target so quickly. Absent-mindedly walking along the wharf, he considered consulting the stars, finally employing his divine skills, but a light on the horizon captured his attention.

  As soon as the phoenix was visible Orryn realized what he was watching and pinched the bridge of his nose. “First the fey, then a Lunar, now a Solar…” he grumbled and immediately began looking for a ship to charter in the morning while pulling out impossibly detailed and accurate maps. “No wonder she’s coming back here.”

  He paused and looked up, giving an errant thought serious consideration. “Or he, I guess. That’d be a fun change.”

  Darkness enveloped the Mustang as Ranma sank, taking the pillar of sunlight with her. The phoenix returned, briefly, spreading its wings and silently screeching to the heavens before sublimating into a shower of sparks that dissipated in the wind.

  Captain Ikka watched the display while clenching her teeth and gripping the handle of her dao with white knuckles. Ranma seemed a perfectly nice kid, and she didn’t want anything bad to happen to…them, but it would make her life so much simpler if they were dead.

  Ikka didn’t follow the Immaculate Way: she hated its arbitrary tenets and the inequitable hierarchies built on its foundation. But not all of the crew shared her perspective; several assumed Ranma had deceived them, some worried that they’d be targeted by the Wyld Hunt, and others just didn’t trust Exalted in general, Anathema or otherwise.

  It was the latter two groups she empathized with the most. Nobody deserved power like that, and whether or not Immaculate doctrine was true they were trouble. Were it up to her, they would have mourned Ranma and remembered them as a tragic hero who saved the crew at the expense of their life. Except it wasn’t up to her; Ranma’s friends wouldn’t allow them to leave without doing everything they could for Ranma. Exalted or not, the three of them who weren’t injured or missing could handle whatever the crew threw at them.

  On the bright side, the crew knew that, and nobody would judge her for capitulating with whatever demands the kids made. If Ranma was alive, she’d have to let the fledgling Anathema back on her ship or face the consequences. No, it was her crew she had to manage. Before the Kuno kid came back, she had work to do.

  “Okay crew, back to yer stations!” she shouted as she began her first performance. “We need ta get th’hell outta ‘ere afore patrols show—”

  Predictably, she was interrupted as both Akane and Kodachi appeared in front of her, anger radiating from their forms. “We’re not going anywhere until Kuno gets back!” “You will remain here!” They said in unison, and Ikka flinched.

  “Tha’ light was visible fer tens a’ klicks in all directions!” She reasoned. “We don’ have time ta—” A whiplike strand of ribbon sliced a lock of her hair with a flick of Kodachi’s wrist, and Akane cracked her knuckles loudly enough for the crew frozen at the top of the stairs to hear.

  As long as the crew saw her making a token effort to take the rational course they’d trust her to keep them safe. She just hoped the teenage girls didn’t resort to violence. “The two of us can handle whatever shows up next,” Akane growled and Kodachi flashed a predatory smile.

  There was one other option: Ikka could stall until a patrol showed up and then turn them all over to the Realm. It was incredibly risky: the soldiers would likely search her ship, find stolen cargo, and clap the whole crew in irons, assuming the kids didn’t take everyone down and steal Ikka’s ship.

  No, she had to play along for now and figure out a plan later. With an exaggerated sigh, Ikka dropped her blade and held up her hands in surrender. “A-aye, I understand.” Looking past the girls, she shouted again. “Change a’ plans: lower sails! Full stop!”

  Her crew grimaced but funneled out from the lower deck to follow her orders. Each sailor saw her standing there with her hands up and a grim expression. This wasn’t her call, after all. Once the ship slowed she relaxed a little. The longer Kuno took to get back the more likely it was that Ranma was dead, and Ikka selfishly hoped they were.

  But her work wasn’t done. “I’m goin’ below deck ta check on my crew,” she informed Akane and Kodachi before heading down, heading straight for Isu’s cot in the infirmary. Next to him was Ukyo, bloodied but bandaged, sleeping peacefully. Ikka’s first mate was sitting up and keeping an eye on the girl.

  “What’ve ya heard?” Despite how softly Ikka spoke, Isu flinched in surprise. Immediately he matched the captain’s tone and affectation, and Ikka took a moment to appreciate how seriously he took his job despite their relationship.

  “Biggest threats are Whoop, Urbin, and Dove.” Ikka nodded: those three commanded immense respect among the crew and had the confidence to challenge her. They were reliable in an emergency so she tolerated them, let them keep her sharp.

  “The kids ain’t gonna let us sail without Ranma,” Ikka kept an eye on Ukyo just in case the girl was just pretending to sleep. She kept her words short, quiet, and relaxed. “I aim ta give ‘em what they want, fer now. Options?”

  While Isu considered her words, the captain scanned the room, identifying the sailors who occupied the other cots, then at Doc Jara, who was treating one of the gunners. Their gazes met and Ikka tilted her head, wordlessly asking for the number of casualties.

  Against all odds, Jara shrugged and shook her head, pointed at Ukyo, and resumed her work. Ikka was stunned: the ship took damage, over a dozen pirates were swept off the deck and into the sea, a monstrous fair folk champion came aboard…and all of her family was still here. Tears hadn’t graced her cheeks in over fifteen years, but now she felt water pooling in her eyes.

  She couldn’t indulge in such frivolity, so she swallowed back the overpowering feelings of gratitude and relief and promised to address them later, in private. Isu saw, he looked nervous, like a child who saw his parents doing something he’d never seen them do before. Ikka asked again, more urgently, “Options?”

  “Get two of them off the Mustang,” his voice was husky, conspiratorial. “Send ‘em to Pinto or Abalone, whichever’s closer. I say Whoop and Urbin. Keep Dove around, listen to what he has to say. I’ll work with Jara and Tam and make sure the crew stays strong.”

  Ikka scratched her chin and made a circuit through the ship. Jara was right: everybody was accounted for. She quietly talked to some of the crew, getting a feel for how they felt about Ranma’s change. Most were grateful, but not to the degree they were comfortable with Ranma coming back on board. Some wanted the whole group gone. Ikka reminded them that said group could easily defeat the entire crew in a fight and that they’d need to put up with it long enough to do something. That cooled the hottest tempers.

  Once she was done, she headed back up to the deck. Akane and Kodachi sat together on the railing, still watching the water. A black piglet and pink cat sat near them, also looking out over the water. Ikka spotted Ryoga and Shampoo’s clothes nearby and put two and two together.

  A grim aura settled over the group. Almost half an hour had passed since Kuno dove over the side and Ikka was sure they were both dead by now. Genuine concern that a patrol ship would appear out of the gloom and search the Mustang replaced the fear of an Anathema breaking her crew in half, and Ikka cleared her throat. None of her guests acknowledged her.

  She’d give them a few more minutes and leaned against the aft mast to think. If Ranma was dead, it would be easy enough to get the rest of them to Gateway and let someone else deal with them. The Mustang just had to avoid patrols long enough to get there, unload their cargo, and lay low for a while. If Ranma was alive things got more complicated. She had no idea if the Wyld Hunt could track Anathema or anything like that. It’d be even more important to get the kids off their ship, but…

  Actually, would it be more important? Was Ranma being here really that much more of an issue? It would cause problems with some of her crew, but it was the combined efforts of all the kids, including Ranma, that prevented a single loss of life among her crew. If one of Ikka’s crew suddenly became Anathema one day, would they turn them over to the Hunt? A member of the family?

  “It’s dangerous ta stay here any longer,” her words were hesitant, contrite. The kids needed to think they were in charge. “We could attract more’n just Realm patrols; other pirates, locals, more fair folk…”

  Akane leaned forward and pointed, “There!” A pale gold light came into view, just barely visible over the surface of the water. It was Ranma, draped over Kuno’s shoulders. The light was significantly dimmed to a shimmering aura and the empty circle on her forehead. Her eyes were closed, and Ikka noticed they were trailing blood.

  “Man over starboard quarter!” erupted from the captain’s throat. “Move, move, move!” Sailors rushed to obey and hauled Kuno and Ranma up to the deck. As soon as they were standing, Ikka commanded the crew to raise sail and make way immediately, then called for Doc Jara while they carefully carried Ranma to a cot.

  That’s when she noticed that Ranma wasn't bleeding despite the jagged piece of crystalline metal sticking through her body, snapped on both ends. She gave Kuno a curious look and realized it was his blood. The sleeve of his kendogi was gone and his arm was covered in uneven lacerations.

  “Brother?!” Kodachi exclaimed, but he just shrugged.

  “A foolish shark thought it could prey upon the Zeal of Nerima.” He sounded utterly unimpressed. Were it not for the jagged parallel gashes on his arm, she’d think he was joking.

  Kodachi relaxed and smirked when she noticed the captain’s astonishment. “Father used to make us swim with sharks when we vacationed in Hawai’i.”

  Captain Ikka could worry about processing that sentence later, for now she needed to focus on the human-shaped divine superweapon dripping on her deck. Jara examined Ranma’s injury as Kuno cradled her, muttering observations. “I think I understand: she became smaller but the spear remained the same size. Her flesh sealed tight and probably saved her from bleeding out, cavity collapse…”

  The atmosphere below deck was aggressive and claustrophobic. The crew was silent as they descended the stairs and all eyes were on Ranma. Ikka was relieved to see so many faces full of gratitude, sympathy, or at least apathy. Too many, however, sneered, scowled, or glared wordlessly, in fury if not fear. Akane and Kodachi flanked Kuno and glared back at the crowd, daring them to try something.

  There were only three of them, and they bore superficial injuries and dark eyes. Their clothes were torn and bloodied. Any other group would utterly fail to intimidate her crew, but Ikka knew Ranma was safe. Briefly she worried about Ryoga and Shampoo, but she had a feeling they could be unpredictable and dangerous even as small animals.

  “I’ll have a talk with my crew,” Ikka informed their guests. “We owe ya a debt a’ gratitude, an’ we need ta discuss what tha’ looks like.” With a flip of her braid, she made her way to the lower deck, bringing every available, uninjured crewmate with her.

  Once the healthy members of the crew disappeared, the oppressive atmosphere of the hold vanished with them. Akane finally allowed herself to stop focusing on Ranma and take stock of the situation. Her fiancé(e) was either asleep or unconscious, but according to the doctor she was at least stable, Ukyo’s injuries would probably leave scars but weren’t fatal, and — she noted with gratitude and awe — every member of the crew was fine.

  Despite that, they were afraid. Of Ranma, of Akane and the others for being associated with Ranma. At worst, the crew wanted them dead; at best, the crew wanted them gone. The only one willing to come close to them was Doc Jara and the tall woman who’d propositioned Ranma and Akane.

  “I’ve treated the Exalted before,” Jara said while checking Ranma’s vitals. “She’s breathing normally, heart beating normally…I believe we can extract the spear in a few hours when she’s recovered a bit more.” With a pat on Ranma’s damp red hair, she took a look at Akane, Kodachi, and Kuno, as well as a sidelong glance at the cat and piglet at Ranma’s feet.

  “It might help ease the crew…” Jara lowered her voice and looked around conspiratorially. “If the rest of you help the wounded recover and assist with tasks. Though I would leave someone here with her until she wakes up.”

  Akane was going to volunteer to watch Ranma, but to her surprise Kodachi spoke up first. “I can treat the injured. Brother, would you help the sailors on the deck?”

  Kuno raised his injured arm, currently wrapped with a towel. “After the good doctor has treated my injuries.” Kodachi nodded and turned to Akane.

  “Miss Akane, you’ll watch over the har—hmm, that is, Ranma, yes?” Before letting Akane respond, she looked at Jara. “Could we, perhaps, change Lord Ranma back to his…true form?”

  The doctor shook her head. “I have no idea how her internals will shift when she changes. At the very least we need to get the spear out first to make sure it doesn’t cause more damage, and we won’t do that for a few hours at least.”

  Kodachi didn’t like it when people told her no, so Akane expected a violent reaction. Instead, she just nodded and, in an entirely too Kasumi-like manner, put her hands together and smiled. “Of course, Doctor. I have been preparing for medical school and study pharmacology, so I understand how to handle any medications you might need to administer.”

  Doc Jara smiled but Akane knew Kodachi was up to something. “Don’t you only know how to work with medicine because of the poisons you’ve subjected us to?” Whatever act Kodachi was putting on wouldn’t work on the youngest Tendo.

  But the other girl was unphased by Akane’s interjection and continued to smile. “You are partially correct, Miss Akane.” Kodachi’s casual admission derailed Akane’s train of thought, leaving her slack-jawed. “Thanks to the indiscretions of my youth, I am very knowledgeable about poisons, venoms, and toxins, that’s true. But it is equally true that I am knowledgeable about their antidotes, anti-venoms, and cures.”

  She chuckled into the back of her hand with some of her signature haughtiness, which made Jara smirk. “Well Miss Kuno, we’ll see what you can do.” Then she nodded at the animals. “Are they going to be okay like that?” Ryoga withered in fear as Akane turned her increasingly furious gaze at him.

  Akane finally allowed herself to relax and get properly angry, not just at Ranma’s erstwhile rival: as much as she didn’t want Ranma to die, as soon as she was better Akane was gonna have words with her.

  “We need to turn Shampoo back at least,” Akane didn’t explain Ranma’s phobia of cats, she didn’t want anyone on the crew knowing about that. “But the pig can stay like that for all I care.” Ryoga’s pitiful whines should have soothed her bruised pride, but they just made her angrier: he didn’t have any right to complain. “I happen to know he likes being in that form.”

  If Jara took her words at face value or heard the fury in her words she didn’t show it. “Sure. Kodachi!” Her voice turned stern and quick, causing Kodachi to straighten her back. “Take this kettle and start boiling some water. We’re gonna need it for salves so we can spare a few splashes for the cat.”

  Kodachi’s eye twitched but quickly got to her feet. “Oh, Miss Akane? When we get home, I would appreciate it if you thanked your sister Miss Kasumi for all the private lessons.”

  By the time Akane processed what she’d said, Kodachi was gone. “Wha—?”

  Akane tried to stay awake, but once she was alone even her anger couldn’t stay sleep’s embrace. Shampoo used the opportunity to ensure their safety on board the ship. Only Ryoga saw her slink away, and he was too busy moping. The idiot.

  She slinked through the ship’s hull and crept downstairs to spy on Miss Captain’s little meeting. If the pirates wanted to throw them overboard, strand them on a deserted island, or turn them over to the Inquisition or whatever, Shampoo would know about it.

  If she were still human, spying on the meeting without the captain noticing would have been difficult: Ikka stood at the far end of the deck atop a crate, overlooking the standing-room-only space where the crew had assembled.

  Shampoo found a wonderfully small nook on top of a stack of cargo that gave her a good view of the entire room and Ikka. She spotted Isu lounging in the corner watching the crew while everyone else faced the captain. Wait…no, he was surveilling the crew, monitoring them while manifesting an aura of apathy. She hunkered back a bit to hide her eyeshine and waited for Ikka to begin.

  “Awright crew, we’ve stepped in it.” She announced gravely. “I know yer worried, I am too. Anathema or no, any one a’ them kids could prob’ly take on tha whole crew.” A murmur of agreement echoed through the room. “We gotta be careful how we handle ‘em. Get ‘em off tha ship as quick as we can.”

  It was as Shampoo thought. She was accustomed to scaring people, but if this was how they could expect to be received by the average person in this world it would be difficult just to survive, let alone figure out a way home.

  This time a few select voices cried out in support, but Ikka raised her hand to silence them. “We’ve also got ta respect they’re the reason we’re all still here.” Different voices rose in assent, Shampoo was heartened by the second group, especially their number and volume.

  “Yer my family, an’ if any a you think I’m not grateful ta them fer savin’ my family yer wrong.” Many of the crew cheered, but Isu took the opportunity to make his exit. It didn’t feel like an accident, and Shampoo turned so she could watch her back, but Ikka didn’t say anything.

  “If it were jus’ them as they were when we found ‘em, that’d be enough, I’d make ‘em honorary crew after tonight.” Ikka sighed and looked down. After spending years around Ranma Shampoo could tell that the captain was putting on a performance, but it was rooted in sincerity. Where was she going with this speech?

  “Ranma’s a problem.” Even the voices that agreed were quiet, ashamed. “But they think she’s their family, Anathema or no.” She pointed to two figures Shampoo couldn’t see. “Urbin, Dove. We’re headed ta Minenden. When we land I want you two ta find a fishin’ boat and take it to Pinto.” Shampoo wished she’d taken the time to look more closely at the maps in the captain’s quarters, she had no idea what any of that meant, but she didn’t trust it.

  “Tha’s where tha Wyld Hunt’s set up,” a chorus of gasps rose from the crew, “I want ya ta tell ‘em the Anathema took o’er the ship an’ tha our last known headin’ was north towards Skullstone.”

  A din of shocked whispers accompanied her command, but she silenced them with a harsh clap. “We're na’ actually goin' ta Skullstone, ya daft fools: I am ta survive this nightmare.”

  Her sly grin was met with a few nervous chuckles. “In case tha’ Hunters are too canny fer a simple misdirect, I won't tell the two a’ ya where we're actually headin'. Lay low on Pinto fer a couple a’ weeks, I know ya got a sweet fella waitin’, Dove.”

  As the tension was slowly replaced by hushed chatter, Ikka waved her hands and sat down. “Awright, back to yer stations, lads, especially if that means a bunk. Mustang needs her crew ta stay sharp.” Most of the sailors filed out, a few stayed to ask the captain some questions, but Shampoo heard what she needed.

  Expertly she snuck out of the lower deck and made her way back to the infirmary. To her immense glee, Ranma was awake and talking to Akane! Before she could get close enough to hear them or let them know she was okay, Isu crouched in front of her out of nowhere.

  “Hello Miss Shampoo,” greeting her with utmost pleasantness, which didn't keep her from letting out an undignified startled yowl. “Apologies for frightening you. The captain bid me tell you that your clothes are in her quarters and once she's done with her meeting that she'll meet you there with some hot water.” Even without malice in his voice, Shampoo's stomach dropped after his next sentence. “Just to make sure you don't go anywhere you shouldn't, you understand.”

  Nestled between Akane and Ranma while they slept should have been a comfortable position, but Ryoga was distraught. It wasn't the worst he'd ever felt, that was either the first time he got lost, when he realized the full effect of the koi rod of love after Ranma demonstrated just what it did to a person, or when he realized he didn't actually have a little sister, but it was up there.

  The worst part was, of course, that Akane would probably never trust him again, and he couldn't blame her. Even though he never intended anything malicious by it, and he never peeked when she was changing, after a certain point he stopped trying to build up the nerve to confess. Then once he met Akari he saw the perfect opportunity to just…let it end.

  The salt in the wound is that Ranma predicted this exact thing would happen. Ryoga was going to confess to her as soon as the boat stopped somewhere, but that didn't matter. He should have just done it before they went to bed, but he couldn't dwell on the past.

  Ultimately it was all Ranma's fault anyway: Ryoga never would have become a pig in the first place if it wasn't for that careless idiot, and for distracting him with that beautiful female body. And of course the jerk basically laughed off every consequence. She was even waking up just a couple hours after getting a spear to the stomach.

  “Uggghhh, oh…this shouldn't be here…” Clearly in a daze, she wrapped her hand around the metal shaft sticking through her and yanked it out without ceremony. Ryoga and Ranma's eyes went wide after the sudden action and they stared at the bright red hole in Ranma’s stomach.

  The pained, girly shriek from Ranma, the panicked squeals from Ryoga's porcine muzzle, and the startled scream from Akane mixed into an unholy cacophony that brought the doctor and Kodachi running.

  “Calm down, calm down! Give me that!” Jara snatched the fey weapon out of Ranma's hand and flung it away, then dashed to get her tools. “Kodachi, keep the wound clean but do not put any pressure on it, and keep her from moving!”

  Akane worked with her erstwhile romantic rival and grabbed Ranma's shoulders while Kodachi wrapped and gently held a towel around Ranma's, all the while as screams erupted from her throat. They'd morphed from surprise to agony as the pain of what she'd done set in, coupled with the intense pressure from Akane and Kodachi.

  Ryoga felt useless: despite their disagreements he didn't want anything bad to happen to Ranma.

  Suddenly Kodachi went flying as the redhead flailed, and he saw an opportunity. Dashing to the galley, he saw the objective: his kettle, gently steaming. As a lone wanderer who frequently got lost and turned into a tiny piglet, he needed a way to transform back without help. His kettle had a detached base and a rounded bottom, which made it very easy to knock over, and the lid popped off easy.

  In seconds he was back, hopped into his pants, and gripped Ranma's arms. Her skin was clammy and he felt her heartbeat pounding under her skin. Something smashed against the back of his skull and he realized Ranma kicked him: she needed her legs held down. “Akane! Get her torso, I’ll get her legs!”

  As soon as he let go of her arms, Akane pounced to follow his lead, and he managed to wrangle Ranma’s flailing legs and wrap them up. He tried not to think about the fact that his hands were resting on her upper thighs.

  Kodachi was able to hold the towel in place and Jara finally came back with a foul-smelling black sludge. “Show me the top.” Kodachi moved her hand away and Jara smeared a dollop of the putrid mix on the hole in Ranma’s stomach. Her screams intensified: the mix was boiling hot.

  “Hold this.” The doctor put Kodachi’s hands and the end of a bandage over the wound. “Don’t let go. Flip her.”

  Ryoga and Akane nodded at each other and carefully rotated Ranma while Jara unspooled the bandage. Once the exit wound was visible, she smeared the rest of the material on it and started hastily bandaging Ranma up.

  “Flip her back over and hold her head at a small incline.” She foisted her mortar and pestle off on Kodachi and pulled out a flask. As soon as Akane got Ranma into position, Jara pinched the redhead’s nose and upended the liquid into her mouth. It smelled like paint thinner.

  “What is that stuff?” Akane winced and gagged. “Some kind of…healing potion?”

  “Nah, high-proof rum.” Jara shrugged and finished off the last gulp from the flask herself. “Need her to calm down, distract from the pain.” Indeed, Ranma now seemed to be coughing violently instead of thrashing, but Ryoga and Akane were dumbfounded.

  “She’s 17!” Ryoga protested, though the doctor just tilted her head.

  “And I’m 39, what’s your point?” Ryoga and Akane shared exasperated looks while they maintained steady holds on Ranma, who gradually went from coughing to minor convulsions.

  “C-can’t even c-cough right, h-h-hurts too m-m-m-much…” Everybody, even the doctor, stared wide-eyed at Ranma as she muttered weakly. She blearily looked around, took stock of the people around her, then saw Ukyo lying next to her and tried to sit up in panic.

  Fortunately Ryoga and Akane still had a hold of her, and though the attempt still made her flinch and groan in pain. “H-how’s Ukyo?” She gasped through gritted teeth.

  “She's fine, just asleep now.” Jara took her tools back from Kodachi and walked them back to her privacy curtain. “Surprised all your screamin’ didn't wake her up.”

  “That's good…” Ranma breathed a sigh of relief and acknowledged the three around her, with a concerned double take at shirtless Ryoga still wrapped around her legs.

  “I'm, uh, probably fine to let go of now, guys.” Ryoga let her go but tilted his head. Her attitude already seemed like it was coming back, despite the bandages gradually turning red around her midsection.

  Akane nodded and let go of her shoulders, gently squeezing one before walking around to the other side of Ranma's cot. In the excitement Ryoga managed to forget about the day's earlier drama, so Akane's sudden mood shift caught him by surprise.

  “Kodachi, I'd like a word with these two alone, if you don't mind.” The dark, cold aura of malice emanating from her muted the distant sounds of the night sea and working sailors, and it was all the younger Kuno could do but obey with a cold sweat.

  Akane sat on a stool, crossed her arms, and glared at the two usually boys. Ryoga was still lost when Ranma groaned and slugged him in the stomach. “You pig-headed ass, I told you to tell her as soon as possible!”

  “Huaahgghhh…!” Ryoga managed to wheeze out an explanation. “Ranma…it’s…the same night!” Then keeled over to catch his breath.

  He swore he could hear the noise Ranma's eyes made as they opened wide. “The same-? Like, tonight? I wasn't unconscious for a week or sumthin’?” She let out a tiny whimper of pain but still shifted to sneer at Ryoga on the ground. “How'd you screw that up, pork-breath?”

  “Ranma.” Akane's voice sliced through Ryoga's retort and commanded Ranma's attention. “How long did you know?”

  Ryoga decided to keep his nose on the floor and avoid getting any more attention from either girl, and he heard Ranma's exasperated sigh. “Since the first night ‘P-chan’ showed up, ‘Kane.”

  “Don't call me that right now!” Pain joined fury in her voice. “The both of you…for two years? Was it funny? Did you have fun laughing behind my back?”

  “I tried to tell ya so many times, Akane!” Ranma pleaded while Ryoga inched away from the cot, away from the imminent crossfire. He planned to accept whatever punishment Akane deemed necessary, unlike Ranma who was already trying to weasel out of taking responsibility.

  “Yeah, I understand why you kept calling Ryoga P-chan now, and all that, but you could have just left me a note!” Akane sniffled. Ranma groaned and Ryoga heard a loud smack.

  “No, you're right. I shoulda tried harder to tell ya an’ you're right to be pissed-owwww…” The cot squeaked when Ranma uncomfortably shifted. “I don’t expect ya to forgive me, but I hope you'll gimme a chance to make it up to ya…”

  Akane let out a single snort of laughter, a wet sound that could easily have been a sob. Ryoga realized he could help a little. He bowed low and offered her one of his bandanas. After a moment’s hesitation she accepted and blew her nose, then took a second bandana to dab her eyes. “Th-thank you…”

  “I should have told you too, Akane, I was a coward. I’m sorry.” Without getting off his knees or raising his head, he shuffled back to his position next to — but not right next to — the cot, just in case. Nobody said a word, the silence broken only by the crash of the sea and the noises of sleeping sailors.

  “Ryoga, please get up,” she sounded broken, which chilled Ryoga’s heart. “I can’t…there’s only…” She sighed and paced, organizing her thoughts and rubbing her temples. Ryoga looked at Ranma, who seemed oddly at ease, though her head started swaying gently out of sync with the ship. Given how much alcohol the doctor poured down her throat, Ryoga wasn’t surprised it was already affecting her.

  “If we were home, I could tell you to leave me alone.” The pit in Ryoga’s stomach widened into a yawning maw and he felt the color drain from his face. “Both of you. I’d tell you to get lost, Ryoga, and I don’t know if I’d ever want to see you again. Ranma…” Tears spilled down her cheeks, the bandana unable to stymie the salty flood.

  “I’d try to get the engagement called off. How could I learn to trust you again? Why would either of you think you could earn a second chance?” Ranma gulped and tears welled up in her eyes. “But it’s like you said when we got here: we’re stuck together. I don’t have the luxury of staying away.”

  Her shoulders slumped and she gave the two an exhausted, exasperated look. “We’re not friends anymore. Not now. I’m glad you’re both okay, but I’m mad. I’m furious. And I don’t forgive you.” She looked like she wanted to say more, but couldn’t find the words. An oppressive weight slid from her spirit and the dark aura dissolved. “I’m going to sleep. Please don’t pick a hammock near mine.” Then she was gone, and Ryoga felt like he was going to fall through the ship and sink into the dark sea.

  He needed to clear his head, take a walk, get lost. He could get lost on this ship, he’d done it already. But a small, surprisingly strong hand caught his and squeezed. It was Ranma’s, her other arm covered her eyes as she gently sobbed. “Please don’t go right now…” she pleaded, and Ryoga looked around in confusion. “It’s just you and Ukyo, please, I need a friend.”

  In the span of a single night, Ryoga witnessed his oldest friend and sometimes rival at her highest and lowest moments. Ryoga had never seen Ranma this despondent. It would have been fitting to leave Ranma to suffer — she was just as responsible as Ryoga after all — but he couldn’t ignore a crying girl, even if he knew that girl was actually a guy.

  So, with a put-upon sigh, he pulled up a stool and sat next to his only friend in the world.

  Captain Ikka figured it’d be Shampoo. The girl gave off a competent, brutal aura and moved with more deliberate grace than the others, and as a cat she was so small. Ikka told Isu to leave the meeting if he noticed one of the kids, and her first thought was the purple-haired girl.

  So when she entered her quarters with a mug of steaming water and saw Isu with the purple cat, she wasn’t surprised. “Here ya are Miss. Isu, let’s give the girl some privacy.” Her first mate gave her a frustrated glare for ignoring security protocol (never turn your back to the enemy) but this was a calculated risk for Shampoo’s benefit. A warrior would understand the gesture.

  “Why am I here?” the girl asked less than a minute later. When Ikka looked back Shampoo was standing next to the window, ready to leap out if necessary.

  “Ya spied on my meeting,” Ikka ambled over and started picking through her shelves of maps. “Thought ya might appreciate some context. Isu wouldya clear off m’desk?” Shampoo was understandably wary but said nothing.

  Ikka lay down three maps and gestured for Shampoo to come take a look. “How much didya hear?”

  The amazon cocked an eyebrow but couldn't help but smirk. “The whole thing.”

  “Great. So, here's Minenden and Pinto.” Ikka pointed to a couple of islands on the map, then moved her fingers a few centimeters north. “We're roundabouts here. The crew I'm sendin’ out are th’ most likely to foment mutiny if I start cooperatin’ wiv’ ya, aye?” She clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth in thought. “Keep an eye on Whoop. He's too good a sailor ta send out, but he's most likely to try somethin' against my orders.

  “We're headin’ here, ta Abalone.” She indicated the largest island in the map. “Original plan was ta drop ya off in Gateway an’ be on our way. But now ya got a Solar Anathema wiv' ya. The devout, the greedy, and the paranoid’ll turn ya in fer a bounty or just ta think they've done some good. Anyone smart enough ta help ya find yer way home’ll catch on ta ya.”

  Shampoo interrupted her, waving a hand to dismiss the captain's explanation. “What is your point?” Ikka rolled her eyes: the young were always so impatient.

  “Ya need ta go after someone who won't contact the Immaculate Order but has what ya need.” Isu tilted his head so subtly only Ikka would notice. “Ya gotta take on tha Guild.”

  Of course, her dramatic delivery didn't impress Shampoo: the girl didn't know what the Guild was, but given the context she could make a guess. “They are…criminals, yes?”

  Ikka nodded. “The largest economic force’n tha world: smugglers, drug distributors, traffickers, among other things. Tomb raiders. Artifact thieves. Information brokers.”

  This story is posted elsewhere by the author. Help them out by reading the authentic version.

  Shampoo waved her hand again. “Yes, yes. Why am I here and why are you telling me this?”

  Smart girl, asking the right questions, Ikka leaned into her chair and propped up her legs on the desk. “I've history wiv' tha Guild. They stole sumthin' I can’t never get back: I wanna see ‘em burn.”

  Ikka didn’t know what to expect from the purple-haired girl, how she would respond to Ikka’s naked declaration of vengeance. She wasn’t expecting a grin. “I understand revenge, captain. You need our help.”

  Isu tensed, hopefully imperceptibly, which rattled Ikka more than Shampoo’s disarming countenance. The crew mentioned that, before she disappeared, the purple-haired girl threw herself into the defense of the ship with reckless abandon. All of the kids were fighters, that much was clear. Shampoo was a warrior.

  “Aye. Ya need guides an’ chaperones ta keep yer noses clean, an’ even wiv’out tha Solar yer all better’n tha Guild’s best goons.” The captain reclined back into her chair and weaved her fingers together on her belly. “Yer free ta look fer help elsewhere, o’ course, but—”

  “This works for us.” Shampoo tapped her foot, not out of frustration but boredom. “I am free to leave?” The captain shrugged. “I shall tell the others. I look forward to working with you, captain.” The proud Joketsuzoku girl confidently strode out of Ikka’s office.

  As soon as the door closed, Captain Ikka deflated. She was old, tired, and needed this day to be over. Right as the eastern sky began to glow purple, of course. Isu crouched beside her and slipped off her sandals, gently rubbing her feet. A vulnerable, desperate moan escaped her lips.

  “I don't like this.” His voice was low and soft, but unyielding. “Consorting with Anathema is asking for trouble.” She didn't respond, in part because each knot he worked out of her calves sent a surge of pain and relief up her aching back, but also because he was right and she was scared.

  “Why engage them at all?” His ministrations ceased and he straddled her legs. Even with his slight build, the chair squealed and groaned under their combined weight. “Talk to me Boud, you know I worry when you close yourself off like this.”

  Captain Ikka grabbed his hands in hers and groaned. “I been runnin' about all night, Blossom, this plan jus’ came t’gether in the past half-hour.”

  “I'm sure it did,” he pressed his forehead to hers, “but you should have spoken to me first.”

  “Aye…” she weakly agreed, and the two cuddled as the sun began to rise.

  Window slats on the side of the ship allowed dawn’s light to filter through and assault Ukyo's closed eyelids. She groaned and reached for her alarm clock and was surprised to find…nothing? Then a sharp, tearing pain cut through her daze and the events of the previous day came rushing back to her.

  She was laying down on a cot in a foreign ocean on an alien world, and the last thing she remembered was some hundred-armed monstrosity swingin’ an oversized sword at her.

  From the aches and bandages on her arms, it must have hit her. Carefully, she sat up, looked around, and almost fainted again when she saw Ranchan and Ryoga curled up together. Given the bandage around Ranma's belly it made sense that she was in the infirmary, but why wasn't Akane with her?

  Then Ukyo realized what she was thinking and had to stifle a triumphant laugh. Something must have happened that made Akane furious at Ranma, and now…wait…what if something happened to Akane? Ukyo quickly got up to her feet and scanned the other cots. Plenty of sailors occupied them but there wasn't any sign of the black-haired Tendo girl.

  Sure, they had eyes for the same fella-sometimes-gal whose curse gave Ukyo weird, hard-to-describe feelings but she didn't want the other girl dead! Fortunately Ukyo's legs weren't injured (she'd need to check herself out later to see exactly what was wrong) so she wandered up to the deck to find some answers.

  Up top, the ship was much livelier, though something seemed off. The pirates were cold and distant, doing their best to avoid her. Most of them anyway.

  “Oh hey, you're awake! And standing!” The tall, muscular woman named…Rose…something. Rosalyn? She came over and slapped Ukyo's shoulder, impressing upon the okonomiyaki chef just how much taller the pirate was than her.

  “Yer darn tootin’,” Ukyo drawled politely, but continued scanning the deck. “Did anyone else…survive?” She didn't want to say the words, she couldn't handle it if they were true.

  The rosie pirate's exuberance didn't diminish at all, in fact she beamed even brighter. “Darlin’ everybody survived!”

  Immense relief washes over Ukyo as she released all her fears in a great sigh. The pirate guffawed and clapped her shoulder. “Truth be told, you were worse off than anyone else. Well…” She hesitated like she’d just accidentally let slip something sensitive, then looked away and started prodding her fingers together.

  “Well it ain't fair to rile me up like a hornet’s nest right after calmin’ me down, sugar.” Ukyo asserted, pulling herself up to her full height and poking the taller woman in the — surprisingly firm — stomach.

  Ukyo’s words clearly embarrassed the woman and caused her to blush, but at least she didn’t deny what she was about to say. “Ranma got impaled, but I heard she’s doin’ okay now.” Ukyo’s eyes went wide. She saw the bandage and assumed the redhead got stabbed or sliced a little bit. Impalement was a big deal!

  “She…she was sleepin’ all peaceful like next to my cot…” Ukyo declared, but the pirate shrugged.

  “Doc says that Exalted heal quick, but she was screamin’ last night so it couldn’t’ve been fun.” She looked around conspiratorially before leaning in and quieting her voice. “Speakin’ of screamin’, she, Akane, and Ryoga got into a big fight. Somethin’ about them keepin’ a big secret from Akane. She told ‘em they weren’t friends anymore. You know what that’s about?”

  This conversation was a rollercoaster for Ukyo. She wanted to be excited about this revelation, but whatever Ranchan and her rival did to Akane that she was willing to end their friendship must have been truly terrible. Ukyo would have to investigate and figure it out for herself.

  “No sugar, no I do not.” Ukyo was too lost in thought to notice the woman blush again. “But thanks for catchin’ me up on the latest gossip!” She forced a big smile onto her face in thanks and the pirate nervously laughed.

  “Oh no problem just wanted to make sure you knew what was goin’ on oh look at that I need to take care of some…knots talk to you later!” The taller woman clipped her hip on a barrel in her hurry to deal with the knots or whatever had her attention, but Ukyo politely waved and headed back to the stairs.

  Before she got there, however, a red blur almost rushed right through her as Ranma sprinted to the ship’s railing. With a sickening heave, she evacuated the contents of her stomach into the ocean several times, groaning in agony between retches. Ukyo couldn't help but chuckle at the sight, though she was the only one. Sailors stopped and stared and kept their distance. They regarded Ranchan like some kinda monster.

  “G’mornin' Ranchan, you sure ya should be up an’ about right now? Heard ya got stuck like a pig.” Ranma moaned and laid her face on the rail, wrapping her arms and legs around it like an octopus.

  “I camf’t helph it Usshhan, ah’m…sssshhhhick.”

  “That's clear as day, sugar, your gills are greener’n cucumber.” She gently rubbed the smaller girl’s back, and noticed a lot of the sailors’ faces softened. Ukyo supposed it was hard to be scared of something when it was sobbing, sweating, and heaving. “D’you know why you’re sick? Didya get stabbed through the stomach?”

  “Nggguuuhhh…don’f pachronische meeee…” Something about the way Ranma was behaving was concerning, but also oddly familiar. Ukyo thought of problem customers, which her Ranchan certainly counted as a lot of the time but she was thinking salarymen, the ones who showed up later in the evening, especially on the weekends…

  “Ranchan are you drunk?”

  “Doctor gave me grooosssshh medicine last night an firscht it was nische but now ‘m sschick.” Now she was hugging the rail like a cat as Ukyo tried to gently pick her up and take her back inside, but even with a hole through her abdomen she was very strong.

  “I know sugar, let's get you away from the side of the ship though, yeah?” Ukyo grunted and risked pulling a little harder to no avail, though Ranma did start crying.

  “Ucchan! I made Akane mad an’ she doesn't wanna be friends anymore!” Now Ukyo was getting embarrassed. This behavior went beyond humanizing and risked infantalizing Ranma in the eyes of a bunch of hardened pirates. Better than high school boys but not by much.

  “I know Ranchan, I heard. You wanna come sit with me an’ Ryoga downstairs?” Without warning her fiancé(e) let go of the ship and Ukyo stumbled back with the limp redhead in her arms.

  “Fiiiinnne. Akane's mad at him too yanno?” Somehow Ranma twisted herself into a bridal carry while Ukyo rolled her eyes and headed to the infirmary. “An’ we deserve it. Ryoga pretended to be her stupid pet pig and I didn't tell her even when I knew and she didn't ever wanna listen…”

  “Mmhmm, I hear ya sugar…” Ukyo tuned out Ranma's rambling and chuckled when she got back to the cots: Ryoga was somehow still sleeping and gently snoring. She sat down on her cot and lay Ranma so that the smaller girl’s head rested in her lap, and began stroking her hair.

  After all, she was one of Ranma’s only two friends now.

  Ranma itched as the Mustang sailed to Gateway. It was hard not to leap out onto the water and explore his new capabilities, the vain, proud part of him was screaming to let loose and have fun.

  Only two people kept him from indulging: Captain Ikka and Doc Jara. The captain explained that the Imperial Navy was already on high alert due to the fair folk presence, and the pillar of light that erupted from him was visible for potentially dozens of kilometers in all directions, especially in the middle of the night on the open sea. Also, if he casually flaunted his power it would further alienate him from the crew.

  The doctor’s justification was more practical: he still had a hole in him and shouldn’t aggravate his injury.

  Atop the mainmast was the only place he could find to pass the time safely. There wasn’t a risk of accidentally running into Akane up there. He was trying to give her space, to give her time to process while he crossed his fingers and prayed she’d give him a chance: difficult on a ship as small as the Mustang. Whenever they ran into each other they exchanged niceties before resuming their tasks. They slept and ate as far away from each other as possible. Ranma didn’t ask anyone else about how she was doing or if she’d said anything about him.

  He was also safe from the crew’s stares and whispers. The only one who came up here regularly was Isu, and he was content to leave Ranma alone. Even the polite pirates gave him a wide berth and made excuses to get away from him. It was isolating and lonely, and all he wanted to do to cope was to spar or train, to test his new limits. But that was irresponsible and could put everyone on the ship in danger.

  Four days after the fey attack he was in a sour mood. Captain Ikka explained their weird 15-month-long calendar and that they were in the tail end of summer. Ranma attended Happosai’s funeral on November 21. Today would be November 25 back home.

  It was his birthday.

  He turned 18 today, and he was trapped in a strange land, recovering from a near-fatal injury, stuck with people he barely trusted or who barely trusted him, and the girl he was in love with hated him. In short, he was having a shitty birthday. Most of his birthdays were; Pops tried, he just had bad ideas.

  Isu hauled himself up beside Ranma and pulled out a spyglass. The white-and-black-skinned man said nothing, as usual, but Ranma felt the urge to say something for once. “Whatcha lookin’ for?” was the best he could come up with, though even Ranma knew the first mate was probably looking for signs of their destination.

  “Other ships, gulls, signs of land, should be arrivin’ at Gateway today.” After a thorough scan of the horizon, he shook his head in disappointment and sat down on the other side of the mast from Ranma. “What’s eatin’ you this mornin’?”

  Nevermind, Ranma didn’t want to talk anymore. But his stupid mouth betrayed him and started flapping. “Last month I killed a god and thought that was the craziest thing I’d ever do, that that was the weirdest my life could ever get.” He chewed on his thumb while Isu inhaled sharply, not out of impatience but respect. “Things were okay for once, and I thought I’d get to celebrate my 18th birthday.” The water reminded him of Akane’s dark blue hair. He wanted to say “with the most important person in my life” but he couldn’t bring himself to admit that out loud. “That’s today, by the way.”

  “Congratulations on surviving this long, if you’ve made enemies of gods.” To his surprise, the pirate seemed unconcerned about Ranma’s deicide. “And that you accomplished such a feat prior to your Exaltation marks you as truly exceptional. No wonder, then.” Isu nodded at Ukyo, who was chatting with Rosseiu atop the foredeck. “Are your companions aware of what today means to you?”

  Ranma doubted it. The only one who probably even knew it was his birthday was Akane, and there was no way she was in the mood to celebrate with Ranma of all people. He remembered her 18th birthday — the 17th was fine but he barely knew her back then and he vaguely recalled it ending with a mallet — he surprised her the weekend before with a trip to the cherry blossom festival in Tsuruoka.

  Planning such an excursion took a lot more work and forethought than he ever admitted to her, especially since he bypassed Nabiki and handled it all himself to ensure nothing and nobody would bother them, and it involved purchasing enough tickets to send the whole household to the Ueno Cherry Blossom Festival in the complete opposite direction. Despite his efforts, they were eventually chased out of the Yamagata Prefecture by ancient enemies of the Tendo family, which made the whole thing kinda Akane’s fault for a change, but they’d fallen asleep laughing about it on the train back to Tokyo.

  It was all worth it, because they spent the whole day more-or-less alone, Akane was suitably impressed he’d gone to all the trouble, and Ranma managed to convince the dads that he and Akane had just gotten lost during one of the transfers so he didn’t even get into trouble. Still owed Nabiki a lot of money for inconveniencing her but he’d budgeted for that as well.

  “Prob’ly not,” he finally confessed after reminiscing. “Most of ‘em don’ even know it is my birthday. An’ I know that’s a kiddy thing ta complain about but—”

  “Most of us don’t know the specific dates of our birth.” Isu interrupted him gently. “Some don’t even know the year. I only know I was born in spring forty-three years ago. On the Mustang we hold a celebration each season to celebrate the anniversaries of when our crew members joined us.” He pointed at another sailor with pale skin and dark hair Ranma couldn’t recall the name of who was doing something with ropes and knots. “Rhapsody joined us about a year ago, he’ll be one of the ones we celebrate next month.”

  Isu looked Ranma in the eye with a stern expression. “This is a brutal world, child. Whatever disagreements and arguments you will have with your companions, understand that they are the only people in this world who will be able to understand you. Talk to them, listen to them, never let them go.” Then he smirked. “I hope you have a pleasant birthday.”

  In all the excitement of being magically abducted and dropped off in a new world, hitching a ride with pirates, and almost getting killed by an army of monsters, Ryoga forgot it was Ranma's birthday. Fortunately, Ukyo had not. She found him staring into the corner of the deepest part of the ship, having intentionally gotten lost in its maze-like bowels.

  If he really was going to end up as some sort of glowing wannabe magical girl like Ranma he hoped it fixed his directional dysfunction. It wasn't fair he had to suffer when everybody else could just walk wherever they wanted without having to plan for an impromptu two week journey first, or unerringly find the bathroom in the middle of the night if they had to pee. Signs were only so useful if the lights were off.

  “I been askin’ the crew about what we c’n get in this Gateway place, and it sounds like the the real deal.” Ukyo was explaining her plan to surprise Ranma with a birthday meal. “Not a one of ‘em’s heard’a okonomiyaki before, neither, but they heard’a the ingredients I need.” When an encouraging smile didn't get a response from him, she prodded with one of her many spatulas.

  “Hey, Salted Pork, ya gotta come outta your funk eventu—”

  “What’d you just call me?” Ryoga ignored the other thing she was talking about: that stupid nickname sounded like something Ranma would call him.

  “‘Swhat some a’ the pirates’re callin’ ya.” Ukyo shrugged, eager to get him back on track. “You were the Salt Guy, now they know ‘bout the pig curse. Which I didn’t, by the way, curious how ya pulled that off for so long considerin’ how smooth ya are. Now I could use some muscle once we reach town an’—”

  “Who’s been calling me that? I want names!” If ever there was a day Ryoga couldn’t handle yet more indignity it was today. Or yesterday or the day before. This whole week was a bad week to have to suffer more indignities, was his point.

  “Hibiki, a moment.” The sonorous voice of Kuno bombarded their private discussion, and Ukyo wrinkled her nose at the interruption. His arm was still wrapped in bandages from the shark attack but at least they weren’t soaked in his own blood anymore.

  “We’re plannin’ somethin’, come back later.” She hoped he’d leave, but her few years at Furinkan prepared her for his stubbornness.

  “Speaking of which, I would like to assist with the preparation for Saotome’s surprise celebration. But Hibiki needs to hear what I have to say.” He stated simply.

  “Look, ya can’t just come in here an’—” Ukyo and Ryoga both blinked. Kuno wanted to…help do something nice for Ranma? And he knew when Ranma’s birthday was? “Ya…ya wanna help?”

  “Yes. Kodachi and I were putting together a plan, she's talking to Akane. I would have gone myself but I fear my love for her would distract me from my objective…” He stared off into space, impressive in the corner of a ship with barely enough room for him to stand at his full height.

  “Yanno I wanna celebrate Ranchan’s birthday an’ make ‘im feel better?” Ukyo seemed to have a difficult time accepting Kuno's offer as genuine, though Ryoga understood why. After the kiss both Kunos seemed weirdly helpful and supportive to Ranma, though not clingy like they used to be. They were up to something, Ryoga just didn't know what.

  Kuno pinched the bridge of his nose. “Is that really so—”

  “Yes!” Before he could even finish his question, Ryoga and Ukyo simultaneously cut him off. The frustrating part was that Ryoga thought he was being sincere, so there was only one possible conclusion: Kuno was in love with Ranma now. For some reason the idea boiled Ryoga’s blood and he wouldn’t allow it.

  “Fine, perhaps we can continue planning after Kodachi convinces my beloved of our sincerity.” Addressing Ryoga specifically, he clapped his hands on the shorter boy’s shoulders and stared intensely into his eyes. “Embrace the name these sailors have given you.”

  Ryoga wasn’t sure how to respond to Kuno grabbing him or why he cared so much. What would accepting an embarrassing nickname do except open him up to further harassment? “I don’t want anybody thinking I like that stupid name!” His protest fell on deaf ears.

  “The point isn’t to like it, the point is to tell these people you are composed and accept their invitation to the in-group! For an insular community like the regular crew of a sailing ship — like these pirates — acceptance is usually difficult, time-consuming, or both for outsiders — which we are.” Both Ryoga and Ukyo stared: Kuno’s typical old-timey affectation was completely gone and he’d settled on a sort of academic voice. “By giving you a name they have, in effect, extended a probationary invitation to join their in-group. Whether they fully accept you as a member or a friend depends on your response to the invitation.”

  Nobody said anything. Ryoga didn’t know where any of that came from, and it was entirely unlike the Kuno he’d gotten to know over the past few days. He spoke with confidence, though if he’d done it in the same florid voice he usually used Ryoga wouldn’t have thought anything of it.

  “Apologies, I’ve been studying anthropology and the evolution of cultures. To put it simply: even though their nickname may sound embarrassing or simple, if you accept it and bear it proudly they’ll like you, and by extension the rest of us.” Satisfied he’d delivered his message, Kuno patted Ryoga’s shoulders and nodded his farewell to Ukyo. “Speak to the lovely Akane Tendo regarding Saotome’s birthday celebration before you finalize your plans, please.”

  He walked away, leaving them them gawping in silence.

  Their first look at a proper city cemented just how far from home they were. Gateway was, by Creation’s standards, a massive port town, the trade hub for the entire Wavecrest Archipelago, and an inevitable stop for anyone traveling to or from the South or East. Its native population, which measured in the thousands, more than tripled thanks to the number of travelers who passed through. The wharf stretched along the coastline for kilometers and anyone who wanted to travel into the city proper faced a maze-like gauntlet of markets, stalls, and warehouses. Its tallest buildings didn’t exceed four stories in height save for a few shrines and municipal structures.

  All that to say it was not terribly impressive to the seven martial artists from modern-day Tokyo. Certainly they could tell it was bustling, and Kuno was especially excited at the sight of so many different types of sailing ships, “A wild mishmash of styles from across dozens of cultures and just as many time periods!” he said. To everyone else it just felt quaint.

  A hilltop fort overlooked Gateway and the surrounding sea, and it took over an hour to negotiate a berth for the Mustang. Ikka seemed particularly frustrated by the daily cost and warned the crew that on the morning of their third day if they weren’t back on the ship they’d have to trek tens of kilometers by foot along the coast to a cove where the ship would relocate after that time.

  Ranma was ready to stretch his legs and enjoy some time off the ship, but the captain stopped him before he could depart. “Saotome, I wantcha ta stay on tha ship t’night. Yer still healin’ an’ I don’ wantcha causin’ trouble.”

  He didn’t want to upset the captain, who seemed like the only member of the crew willing to talk to him longer than a few minutes — Isu was nice but very quiet — but the last thing he needed on his birthday was to stay cooped up in a floating house.

  “Don’t fret none, Ranma honey, we’ll scope things out an’ tomorrow we can show ya the sights.” Ukyo gave him a consolatory pat on the back and disembarked, keeping Ryoga close at hand. He watched his friends and crew head out into the city, and he was surprised that the Kunos asked him if he wanted anything in particular. With all of his sulking he wasn’t able to do anything but shrug, however, and soon he was sitting alone on the ship’s railing.

  Until Akane came up. “Ranma…” she startled him, lost in his thoughts as he was. She giggled and continued. “I didn’t mean to scare you.” He would have denied what she said if not for her very earnest smile. So instead he held his tongue and waited, hoping she’d come to forgive him.

  “I wanted to say happy birthday.” There. Finally, someone acknowledged it, he had to try very hard to contain his emotions and wished he was in his girl form: it was just easier to not care about how people looked at him when he did girly stuff like cry in that form. “I was gonna take you to see a movie, but I had a big plan for winter break where we'd sneak up to my aunt's place in Myoko for a few days.”

  She looked wistful and sad, echoing Ranma's feelings. He'd do anything to apologize, he just wanted her to listen. But it was too early, their emotions were too raw.

  “Thanks ‘Kane, I really appreciate it.” His smile was forced but he made sure to put the Saotome sauce on it and make it look real. It really did mean a lot that she remembered his birthday was today, and even more that with things as they were between them to acknowledge it.

  “You're welcome.” With glittering eyes she looked over the cityscape as the sun inched closer to the horizon. “The captain gave us some spending money, said we saved her a load on ship repairs and kept everyone alive, so we got a full share each.”

  Ranma's betrayed face sent her into a fit of giggles. “Don't worry, I'm sure she'll give you some tomorrow, she just doesn't want you tempted to go into town with an actual coin purse.” She jiggled a small burlap sack tied with twine and was rewarded with the clinking of metal coinage. “Promise I'll get you something. You'll stay here, right?”

  On the one hand, Ranma couldn't help but feel that he was being singled out for some reason, and that itch to slip unseen into the city streets and see what secrets he could uncover had been growing all day. On the other, Akane promised she would come back and would be disappointed if he wasn't here.

  “Sure, ain't like I got anywhere better to be.” He shrugged with all the casual indifference he could muster. A year ago he would have stubbornly followed her into town just to spite her for daring to ask him to stay behind. Hell, a week ago he might have done that. Getting impaled by an interdimensional conqueror inspired him to do some serious soul-searching, especially so soon after Saffron.

  Akane’s cool-toned raven hair disappeared into the mass of bodies as Ranma continued to brood.

  Preparations for the fete were underway. While they lacked access to their family’s wealth and status in this strange world, the Kunos nevertheless understood how to throw even a meager allowance around to make a splash. Between his sister’s dark and mysterious beauty and his own magnetic charisma, Kuno and Kodachi captured the hearts of every merchant and vendor they came across. Many were so awed by their ineffable presence that the Kuno siblings secured significant discounts.

  The illusion of wealth created a tempting target for varlets of all varieties, and Kuno had to admit it was useful having the angry fanged boy and Kuonji’s sister serve as two extra pairs of eyes to watch out for hustlers and cutpurses, and the friendly tall woman pirate — Rosseiu he believed her name was — graciously explained how the various types of currencies exchanged and which sellers would accept which kinds.

  Once Kuno’s sincerity was beyond question — after Kuonji spoke to Akane of course — he was glad to see the fanged boy experiment with accepting his nickname. Rosseiu, as Kuno predicted, always addressed him as Salted Pork and carefully watched his reaction. Despite the boy’s anger, he kept his cool the first few times and eventually responded as if it was his name.

  The sun was slipping below the horizon by the time they came back to the ship, laden with supplies. Kuno spotted the loathsome Sao—...rather, he spotted Saotome speaking with the lovely Akane. A flash of anger surged through him: while he had a strategy for freeing the redhaired girl from Saotome’s influence, the vile sorcerer clearly had designs on the young Tendo scion as well. Whereas Kuno’s love for the girls was pure and righteous, whatever perverse designs Saotome had on the girls could only be twisted and profane.

  Fortune favored Kuno, however, and Akane broke away from Saotome, leaving the black-haired monster to sulk on the ship’s railing like a woman. That thought sparked another, and he realized what Saotome needed in this moment was a powerful, masculine presence to comfort him and strengthen the femininity seeping into his soul by the pigtailed girl’s resistance.

  However, he was carrying a heavy load, and before he could find an excuse to put it down his sister beat him to Saotome’s side. As Saotome’s nemesis, Kuno had no idea what she saw in him, but he always seemed blind to the obvious superiority of a Kuno woman, so at first he thought nothing of her meddling.

  To his horror, Saotome responded positively to her subtle approach. Kodachi gave him a respectable amount of space, didn’t make any sensuous movements, and presented herself as a worried friend. She even gave him a little wave as she made her way below deck. Fury burned behind his eyes but he had to bide his time and strike at the correct opportunity. Perhaps the next time the pigtailed girl was active, he’d try a similar approach.

  “Wow, y’all got a lot of stuff.” Saotome observed from his perch, eyeing the crates and bags they were carrying. “What’s the occasion?”

  “We’re gonna thank the crew for lookin’ out for us, sugar!” Kuonji replied, expertly disguising their actual intent behind a half-truth. “Managed to scrounge up everythin’ to make okonomiyaki!”

  Despite their storied history — not to mention Kuno’s desire to crush Saotome’s spirit — the pigtailed boy’s unbridled excitement warmed Kuno’s cheeks and curled the tips of his mouth into a slight smile.

  “Right on! Lemme know if ya need any help, Ucchan!” Ranma exclaimed, then adorably nodded at the rest of the group. “Y’all want me to carry anythin’?”

  “We don’t need any help from a weakling like you, Ranma.” Kuno had planned on refusing in a way that let Ranma save face but also emphasized Kuno’s strength and masculinity, but the idiot pig boy had to run his mouth. Granted, it was clearly good-natured teasing, but Kuno could turn that to his advantage.

  “I think what he meant to say is that the doctor gave you strict orders to recover, Saotome,” Kuno said with a glare at Ryoga. “You deserve a chance for me and Salted Pork to pamper you.”

  His gambit was to use a cutesy word like pamper to surreptitiously seed the idea into Saotome’s mind that he deserved plush, decadent, fragile things and that it was okay to embrace them, but he would probably push back against it without something else to focus on. Something like his long-term…friend? Rival? Perhaps they were secretly homosexual lovers like some of the folks Kuno met at college. Whichever the case, if Saotome hadn’t heard of the boy’s new nickname it would hopefully—

  “Salted Pork!?” As expected, Saotome immediately began cackling. Ryoga blushed but the other half of Kuno’s gamble reared her head.

  “Trust me kid, ya don’t wanna know some of your nicknames.” Rosseiu came forward and treated Saotome to a half-serious glare. His laughter ceased immediately.

  “W-wait, I’ve got a nickname?” He hopped off the ship’s railing with a horrified expression. “It’s not…it can’t be that bad, can it?”

  “I suppose that depends on who ya ask, though if ya don’t like it when the nicest thing folks have t’say about ya is about your body I wouldn’t try too hard ta figure it out.” She hid a wink to the lost boy and headed below deck to help prep the food.

  “You heard her Saotome, guess Salted Pork ain’t such a bad name after all.” With a smug grin, the angry boy pivoted and hurried to follow the tall pirate.

  That left Kuno alone with Saotome. He wasn’t sure what people had to comment about Saotome’s features, he was at best average-looking, but perhaps pirates had a much lower standard to compare him to. “Chin up Saotome, at least they probably aren’t as bawdy as whatever they’re calling the pigtailed girl.” He said as consolation before heading downstairs.

  The last thing he heard was Saotome, screaming in frustration “So that kiss didn’t do anything!?”

  Bags and bags of things that looked like shrimp, fish, and octopus, as well as foods Akane recognized like onion, mango, and seaweed were piled high in the cramped little galley, but everybody groaned when Ukyo declared, “Sorry y’all, it’s jus’ too dang small in here to set up the griddle an’ do all the prep. They ain’t gonna let us cook on deck — believe me I tried — so we’re gonna have to relocate.”

  Gesturing at several barrels and crates, Ukyo had most of their group start hauling stuff back out of the ship to get started on the stone pier. Before Akane could grab a crate and start helping, the okonomiyaki chef pulled her aside. “Hold on ‘Kane, gotta favor to ask of you.”

  That was unexpected. While Akane was on good terms with Ranma’s childhood friend, she didn’t think they were particularly close, so she had no idea why she was being singled out. Her eyes narrowed as she suspected Ukyo didn’t want her to help out with the cooking, despite the fact that she’d been getting better! “Sure, what do you need?”

  “Any chance you can keep Ranchan busy for the next hour or so while we get everythin’ set up? Figure you’ve got a better chance’n the rest of us to keep him distracted since he probably wants you to forgive ‘im.”

  Akane stared blankly at Ukyo’s very forward reasoning and chastised herself for suspecting the girl of being so judgemental. “Oh! Yeah I can do that. I've got the perfect idea, is it okay if I give him his present early?”

  Mild irritation flashed across the okonomiyaki chef’s face but she nodded. “I s'pose. Don't take too long now, y’hear?”

  With an unconscious spring in her step she vaulted off in search of Ranma, and was too lost in her thoughts to hear Ukyo's sigh of relief. “Phew! Was afraid we were gonna hafta hogtie her if she didn’ go for it.”

  Finding Ranma wasn't too hard: he was sulking on the ship’s taffrail all by himself, staring at the dozens of ships anchored out in the ocean who either couldn't or didn't want to afford the berthing fees. Akane wasn't trying to hide the sound of her footfalls but jumped a little when Ranma addressed her without even looking back.

  “‘pparently that kiss didn't do nothin' for Kuno after all…”

  Akane didn't know what he meant at first, and wasn't even sure he was talking to her, until he turned around and looked at her with shimmering eyes. “‘Kane that's two guys I've kissed an’ I didn't even wanna kiss either of ‘em!”

  Perhaps it wasn't the best time to bring it up, but the still angry part of her brain dredged up the memory of another male “suitor” of Ranma's. “Did Picolet not count?” She asked with complete sincerity.

  She almost laughed at the palpable shimmer of a brief, furious aura around Ranma as he stared daggers at her. Settling for a demure chuckle that mollified his anger, she joined him on the rail.

  “Do you know what today is?” She asked conspiratorially, unaware of the conversation he'd had with Isu hours earlier. Ranma looked at her suspiciously, but shook his head.

  “Monday?”

  “It's your birthday.” She couldn't help but grin as Ranma's face lit up. “And I'd like to give you your present. But we have to go get it.”

  Incandescent, wholesome glee filled Ranma's entire body and he leapt straight up into the air and flailed his arms. “Ah! You remembered! You cared!” Mid-jump he paused and landed gingerly on his toes, energy suddenly drained. “You…I just thought…after what happened with Ryoga…”

  Even expecting it to come up, Akane frowned and felt her fingers twitch in anticipation of a slap, but she'd been working through her feelings for days now, and with Ukyo's help no less. Also Captain Ikka, strangely enough, who told her Isu overheard her talking to Ukyo.

  “Can we not talk about that right now?” She managed to ask calmly despite the tightness in her jaw. “I'm…I shouldn't have said we aren't friends, and I need to talk to both of you, but after…after.”

  With effort, she gave Ranma a big, sincere smile. “You're still important to me though. That's not gonna change.” Demonstrating that she could still laugh at their situation, she cocked an eyebrow. “Unless you have any more secrets I should know about?”

  “N-no! I swear!” In protest he waved his hands back and forth, and Akane realized as much as she wanted to she couldn't trust him, not yet.

  But that was a conversation for later. “Good. You can start to make it up to me by coming to get fitted.”

  “Fitted? You ain't puttin’ me in a dress or nothin’, are you?” Akane rolled her eyes as they departed the ship.

  “I thought you didn't care which form you're in anymore.”

  “I don't, but I need something practical to fight in while we're here.” A woman wearing an off-the-shoulders kimono and some sort of strapless push-up bustier walked by and they both blushed. Akane definitely wasn't used to the casual level of flesh on display on this island. The pirates covered up to protect themselves from the sun and all the rough surfaces they clambered over all day, but nobody gave it much thought in Gateway, apparently.

  “...You're not gonna put me in somethin' like that, are ya?” Ranma asked, and while Akane was confident he meant it as a joke, there was enough actual concern in his voice that he must think it was a possibility.

  “Of course not! We're getting you normal clothes for your boy form!” She insisted, though her traitorous brain couldn't help but supply her with an image of Ranma's girl form wearing something similar.

  Before she could process that, however, they turned a corner and witnessed a group of revelers dancing around an open fire in the middle of the street. Upwards of twenty people, completely nude except for red or white paint hand prints slapped haphazardly on random parts of their bodies. Nobody else seemed to notice or even care.

  “I guess…modesty isn't something we're gonna need here, huh?” Akane could only nod in response.

  As birthdays went, this had to be one of Ranma's favorites. Definitely top three. Akane was still feeling raw but they had a friendly walk and talk and she bought him three new hand-crafted tangzhuang from a local tailor! Though they called them silk tunic jackets here for some reason.

  Regardless, she got one in his favorite red color with long sleeves, one in black with short sleeves, and a sleeveless one in white. All of them were a little longer than the ones he had back home, and lined and accented with gold. It made them look much more ostentatious than he was used to, but the gold sash belt really tied the look together.

  Nearing the ship meant Ranma smelled the familiar scent of okonomiyaki and immediately started salivating. Even with the salt Ryoga had been sharing, half a week of the same meal was boring.

  Plenty of crew already had food, and it was bizarre seeing people just carrying okonomiyaki around in their hands, but none of them seemed to care about the mess. There was an enormous line, Kodachi was acting as a greeter to explain what okonomiyaki was and how much it cost for customers from outside of the crew. She wasn’t great at it, and Ranma felt a pang of nostalgia when he thought about how Nabiki would have this place running like a full business if she was here. The business classes she’d taken in college just made her an even more efficient financial predator. Then he wanted to slap himself for wishing she was here, she’d absolutely just make things more difficult for all of them.

  Kodachi flagged the two of them over as soon as she spotted them. “About time you got back.” She sounded frustrated but was so enamored with Ranma’s new red tangzhuang it was all she could do to not drool. “Let me address these peasants and I’ll take you to the tent.”

  Leaping up onto a bollard she addressed the customers. “Fine people, we beg your patience for a few moments. Our chefs and staff need a short break before we resume service!” The groans of disappointment and impatience weren’t too frustrated, and the line dispersed to mingle with everyone else on the pier.

  Inside the sweltering tent, erected using some of the ship’s spare sails, everyone was fanning themselves and trying their best to beat the heat, and they couldn’t even douse the flames to cool off, nor could Shampoo or Ryoga use water.

  Still, most of them acknowledged Ranma and Akane with a curt wave and a smile. Except for Ryoga. “Ranma! I hope you're grateful for the work we're doing for you!” He snarled while furiously fanning himself with a reinforced bandana.

  Of course, Ranma didn't know what he meant. Ukyo said this was for the crew of the Mustang, not Ranma. The only one who even remembered it was his birthday was Akane, unless Ryoga just meant that Ranma couldn’t do anything because of his injury and therefore would get the fruit of their labor.

  “Hey it's not my fault I got impaled, I tried to help but Ucchan wouldn't let me!” He protested, but Ukyo held up a hand to silence the two of them.

  “He ain't wrong, Ranma honey, the idea started off for you. I wanted to make ya a happy birthday okonomiyaki, like I woulda done if we were back home. But then these two had the great idea to scale it up.” She gestured to Kuno and Kodachi, who nodded. “If we treated the whole crew to somethin' they've never had before as thanks, it keeps things nice an’ friendly.”

  “Which you especially need right now.” Kuno interjected without malice or judgement, though it was hard to interpret as wholly innocent.

  “Wait, so…You all knew it was my birthday today?” It seemed so unlikely, he assumed everyone here hated him except for Akane and Ryoga. But they confirmed that they had, in fact, known.

  Ryoga even fished out a jar from the ingredients and handed it to him. “This is part of your present I got when I was in Osaka earlier this year. Rest is in my bag but you can put this on your okonomiyaki if you want.”

  Some sort of green vegetables floated in a brine, the sticker on the front was written entirely in romaji. “Pickled Harapēnyo? I've never had it.”

  Ryoga shrugged. “I know you like spicy food so when I saw that in one of the import stores I thought you'd be interested. I also brought some dried.”

  “We all got you something today,” Shampoo began. “It's in the Captain’s quarters on the ship. But I would have given you a package of Nanniichuan power, waterproof soap, and an invitation to the Joketsuzoku Festival of a Thousand Springs on New Year's Day. I, ah…would have gotten you something else for the first part if I knew you're not bothered by the curse anymore.” She added the last part while poking her fingers together and looking at her feet.

  “The festival you were gonna invite me to was in your village on New Year’s Day?” A lone eyebrow elevated on Ranma’s face as he immediately saw through Shampoo’s intent.

  “Yes?” Shampoo replied innocently, holding her hands up to her cheeks and opening her eyes as wide as possible. Ranma stifled a laugh: that was his move! But it did speak to Shampoo’s evolving tactics. She’d spent the last two years working with Cologne to coerce Ranma into marrying her using curses, violence, or deception.

  “Well, thanks I guess.” He looked at Kuno and Kodachi, curious if they’d actually gotten him something.

  Tatewaki coughed and looked sheepish, “I…that is…I didn’t plan on getting you anything, Saotome. But I was aware it was the day of your birth because of this one.” He elbowed Kodachi, who looked guilty.

  “I had several bouquets scheduled to be delivered to your home, and I was going to spend the weekend baking pastries to go with them…” Like with Shampoo, Ranma immediately understood why she was acting cagey. Unlike Shampoo, her hesitation made it clear she hadn’t changed her tactics.

  “Let me guess: everything was laced with a paralytic or sleeping potion?”

  “Ah…y-yes. And, um…aphrodisiacs.” Now she was blushing, which wasn’t something he’d ever seen her do. He and Akane shared a knowing smirk.

  “Well, that’s gonna be a fun surprise for Ma and Pops…I bet.” As soon as he brought up his parents the tent fell silent. He’d been trying to avoid thinking about home beyond a surface-level understanding that they were trying to get back, but putting faces to it, wondering about life continuing without them, imagining the worry of friends and family…

  “Awright ya jackasses, we’ve had a long enough break and the good people are waitin’!” Ukyo shattered the mood with a perfect distraction. “Ain’t no room for the two of you, so take a servin’ and make space for the payin’ customers.”

  Akane and Ranma got actual plates borrowed from Ryoga’s stash and within seconds Ukyo dropped steaming hot okonomiyaki in front of them, then shooed them out of the tent. Kodachi resumed her vigil and proclaimed that food service was back on.

  As he savored his first bite and let the achingly familiar taste fill his mouth and soothe his soul, Ranma decided his 18th birthday was his favorite.