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178: The Mask

  Paxolnaz was seething. It tore at the Interior around it as it travelled, spikes of it launching out and impaling weaker entities, shredding them and sending them fleeing before it. How much had the Denizen told the human? It would have liked to go and interrogate the creature, but knew there was no point. The Denizen would never speak a word to it.

  Perhaps it should simply have the Denizen killed, grant its wish, but it was loathe to do so. The Denizen’s suffering was a potent source of energy, something that was even capable of faintly nourishing the spark of True Warp within Paxolnaz; nourishment it was in dire need of. When not called away to slave for the Unwinder, working on the human or one of its other goals, Paxolnaz spent the rest of its time feasting on the Denizen’s pain and despair.

  Beyond that, killing the Denizen and granting its wish would mark Paxolnaz in a way that its brethren would be able to sense. Some might consider it an act of treachery, which could lead to undesirable consequences in the future.

  It turned the thoughts aside. The Denizen didn’t matter anymore; the human had already spoken with it and was aware of Paxolnaz’s designs. It had felt that clearly. The human was no longer the oblivious target it had been until now. Already it had been difficult to break, now it would be doubly so.

  This was why Paxolnaz had decided to move its plan forward. There was no point in acting from the shadows when the human knew it was lurking in them.

  With the Soul Rot applied the human was on a time limit. Paxolnaz would have liked to enforce a more immediate, forceful consequence that would immediately send the human to touch the Blade, but the Blind Judge was only capable of so much.

  So, this half-measure. Either the human would go and touch the Blade, and then, as it was twisted and mutated and became something else, something to which their Contract no longer applied, Paxolnaz would Skin it. Or, it would refuse to go and the Soul Rot would kill it. Paxolnaz had learned much of the human and knew that it’s drive to survive was paramount. When it ran out of options, it would go to take the Blade.

  However, the human would certainly work to find some other way. This was why Paxolnaz had held back the second use of the Blind Judge. Whatever the human came up with it would simply nullify with a second twisting of the Contract; if the human even came up with some kind of method. Paxolnaz knew for a fact that there was nothing that could help the human remove the Soul Rot anywhere near, because it had personally seen to that. Symbiotes and Imbued had been found and destroyed, alongside any Natural Resources which could be used to create such Symbiotes.

  Either the human would become its Skin, or Paxolnaz would see it dead.

  At the very least, thought Paxolnaz as it emerged into the depths of the castle and saw the Core, the human is continuing to change. It had observed that the Black Gift within the human had been swelled by enough energy now that it was too large to entirely fit in the strange little cage the human had built. This should surely bring about some positive changes.

  ###

  ‘What the fuck was that?’ came Jo’s voice, ringing out in the moments after Paxolnaz had faded away, pulling Nicolai from his thoughts.

  ‘A dangerous being,’ said Nicolai softly.

  ‘It said the castle is going to collapse,’ said Daksh. ‘It did, right? That’s what it was saying.’

  ‘You knew that thing,’ said John, staring at Nicolai. ‘You’ve had dealings with it. Why did you never mention this?’

  ‘You hid it from us?’ added Jo, and there was accusation and shock in her tone. The emphasis she placed on us told him she was thinking much more of her and Beth, than the whole group.

  Nicolai looked away, hiding his face. One of his lies had been revealed. He cared very little. He sighed, struggling to gather the energy to summon up more shit to talk. ‘I happened to have an… unfortunate encounter with it,’ he said. ‘It forced me into a deal, a Contract. I’m sorry that it happened to turn up here, and now.’

  ‘Why did you never mention this?’ said Cait.

  Nicolai shrugged, staring at a patch of wall. The wall stared back. ‘That was part of the Contract. I couldn’t tell anyone. I suppose that’s no longer in effect, since its shown itself to all of you.’

  ‘Are we safe? That thing… what might it to do us?’ asked Old Ben, blinking worriedly.

  ‘You’re all safe,’ said Nicolai. He wanted to turn away but the way the wall was staring at him was annoying. He felt like it was a competition, and he disliked the idea of losing. ‘Actually, you are safer than any others in this castle In our Contract, I specified it may not harm me nor any dependants of mine. So long as you remain my dependants, you will be safe.’

  He almost smiled with these words, realising there was some benefit. You’re just a wall, he thought at the wall, and turned away. He did his best to ignore the smugness he could feel from it, forcing himself to think on more important matters.

  This tied the group tighter to him. If they thought that no longer being a part of “his group” meant they might be attacked by the Demon, they would be pressured to follow his commands lest he kick them out. He could likely be a little more strict and forceful in his commands via use of that fear, make them all better behaved and more useful.

  His Mask started burbling as it detected these thoughts. Nicolai might have twisted it aside, but he’d been reminded of its importance. If he wanted to resist the dark, and the Demon, he… needed the Mask.

  I’ll only be more strict when it comes to commands that help them, he reassured it. Such as making sure they follow proper counter surveillance protocol when returning to the safe place. It wouldn’t do for someone to learn where I—where we live.

  The Mask accepted these words. A little grudgingly, but it calmed down… until it noticed Jo’s expression, and Perro, and the rest of them. Then it was writhing with upset, horrified that they might lose all trust for him.

  So Nicolai looked entreatingly to them, his face a picture of dismay. He shook his head. ‘I wish I could have told you all. I had no choice. It found me, and bound me with a Contract.’ His gaze was drawn to Jo, who seemed the most upset. ‘I would have told you. Of course I would have—if I were able. I’m glad that you know, now. As I said, with the Contract between me and it, it cannot touch any of you. It wants something from me, that’s all. For me to go and find something.’

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  The others were softening, relaxing. The words he spoke held something unusual: Actual truth, real emotion. His Mask was giving him the truth and the emotion, and he filtered it.

  His expression turned grim. ‘At least it has brought us some useful information. As we suspected, this castle will not remain standing for much longer.’ He scattered a meaningful look amongst them. ‘We have no time to waste. As to anything else you wish to know regarding what it said, I know little. Kleos and Maric may know more.’

  The others babbled at one another, filtering away up the stairs to question the heads. Nicolai remained fixed in place. There was a sick feeling inside of him. It came from his Mask. It hated the lies. It was making him feel… bad.

  Just as important, the wall was still staring at him.

  A face appeared before him, and words spiked through the shadows that gathered before his face.

  ‘—ask…’ Jo trailed off, staring at him. She was biting her lip. She looked over her shoulder at the others. Back to him. ‘Are you okay?’

  Nicolai tilted his head, gazing into her eyes. His Soul Sense reached for her. She was concerned due to his behaviour? Was he failing at being normal? What had she noticed?

  Threat Analysis unrolled a list. Shooting the short man into pieces. Raving about all kinds of things. Glaring at walls. Speaking to guns, and weapons, and the shadows.

  I don’t speak to my guns, he told the Module. Threat Analysis informed him that sometimes he did. Did she notice? His eye lenses lit up and he saw a recording. It was before he’d sent the others from Maxine’s tower, to face the Cyborgs alone. Jo was not far from him.

  In the recording, his mouth grazed the side of the AA-12, almost a kiss. ‘Don’t worry…’ he whispered. ‘Soon.’ He saw her shoot him an odd look.

  The recording faded and he snapped back to reality, cringing internally. ‘I’m fine,’ he told her. ‘How are you?’

  ‘I’m, uh… could you give me some space?’ She waved a hand, and he realised his Soul Sense had come forward to cluster tight around her, pressing her own back and into her. She didn’t seem concerned, but she should be. It seemed she wasn’t able to see the strands of dark within it, clustering, reaching, hungering.

  His Soul Sense flinched back with his realisation. It had been acting without his conscious will. He didn’t remember talking to the shotgun. There was too much dark in him and he was losing his mind.

  ‘Sorry.’ He didn’t know what else to say. He felt dizzy and confused. He wasn’t sure how to act.

  After a moment she shrugged. ‘I’ve been better, but at least everyone is in one piece.’ She smiled. ‘Because of you.’

  ‘Me?’

  ‘You got us through it, up there. Sending us all away, to fight the Cyborgs yourself.’ She shook her head, let out a breath. ‘You don’t need to, you know? We can help.’

  ‘Right.’ He’d sent them away because they’d only have gotten in the way.

  ‘But about that… that thing.’ Her eyes were wide with worry and concern. ‘What was it? It was terrible, horrible. And what does it want from you?’

  Nicolai stared at her. Was she actually concerned for him? He was beginning to think she was. His Mask was wriggling on his face and against his Soul. Where he was empty, with half his attention focused on holding back the Soul rot, it was full up. It seized at the reigns, and for the first time he did not fight back. It was all too much for him. The Dark and the Mask, and he needing to Control it all. He didn’t know what to say; what to do; in this moment.

  The Mask had all kinds of ideas, and unlike the Dark he didn’t think it would cause any significant problems. It could handle this for him.

  Nicolai let go.

  ‘I…’ said the Mask, staring at Jo. ‘I…’ The Mask laughed. ‘Am free?’ The tiny Soul-parts of the Modules buzzed around the Mask, curious about this latest change in the internal mindscape, feeling at the fresh emotions emanating from it.

  ‘Free? Does the Demon want to trap you?’

  ‘Paxolnaz? Oh, it wants me to get a sword, that’s what it says. But I think that’s part of its plot to stop me from becoming a Better Man. That’s my purpose, to become more human, to be a Better Man. I… wow.’ He raised his hands, staring dizzily at them. ‘I’m human.’

  She was regarding him through narrowed eyes. ‘I know you’re human. What else would you be?’ Her eyes widened. ‘Wait, are you human? You never gave me a straight answer about that, after you went in the painting.’

  ‘I am human, Jo!’ he grinned at her. ‘I feel... human.’ Gazing at her, he realised something, something that Nicolai, so obsessed with self-control, had never been willing to notice. ‘You’re beautiful.’

  ‘W-what?’ She let out a shocked laugh, her face turning pink.

  ‘Sorry, should I not have said that?’ he asked, concerned.

  ‘Sure, I just wasn’t expecting it. Uh. What was that about being a better man?’

  ‘It’s my purpose, my goal in life. To be a Better Man. It’s difficult. He resists, you know? He’s always arguing with me. And then there’s the Dark.’ His words sped up. ‘I fear that it will take control. Even with the Contract, I’m not sure you’d be safe.’

  ‘Holy shit.’ She grabbed at him, clutching at his arms and staring into his eyes as though hunting for hidden truths. ‘I knew it. I knew it. The Demon, right? Is that what’s happening, when you go… go like that? It’s trying to control you?’

  ‘N—‘ the Mask began, only to be wrenched into silence as Nicolai rose out of the depths of their mind like a leviathan, the whole of his Soul clenching around the Mask. Do not tell her too much. Some details cannot be shared.

  The Mask gritted its teeth, pained. ‘Yeah. The Demon. It’s trying to Control me, Jo.’

  ‘What can I do? How can I help?’

  ‘You’re helping right now. Just talking to you like this helps me grow stronger. With that, I can better resist the Da—Demon.’

  ‘It all makes so much sense now,’ she murmured. ‘When those guys attacked us and you… Well, now I know the truth. That was the Demon. You are a good man.’

  ‘I’m not a good man, Jo,’ the Mask warned her. It knew that Nicolai viewed her more as a useful asset than a loved companion. If he was given reason enough, he would discard her. The Mask’s goal was ensure she and the others survived him, because that was what a Better Man would do. ‘You shouldn’t trust me.’

  She smiled at him. ‘Well that proves it. Don’t worry, I understand. You don’t have to keep up this shell with me.’ She glanced at the stairs, where he saw Beth peering suspiciously at them. ‘Come on, let’s go join the others.’

  The Mask trailed after her, struggling internally. It’d told her the truth, and she trusted him more? It opened its mouth to say more, when Nicolai held it tight.

  You’re doing good, don’t mess it up, he said.

  The Mask scowled. But they shouldn’t trust you! You could lose Control, and the Dark will kill them all!

  It’s your job to make sure that doesn’t happen, isn’t it? And you’re doing well. We’re working together, you and I. Teammates.

  The Mask gave a half nod. It was doing well, but it felt that there was much room for improvement.

  But there is something we need to talk about. What is the endgame?

  The Mask frowned. What do you mean?

  I mean you need to think ahead. Paxolnaz isn’t going to stop, and simply warning the others won’t necessarily be enough. If the Demon seizes control of me and comes for them, then them knowing to be wary won’t actually help, will it? If the Dark took full Control then it would kill them regardless of any warning. They cannot stop me. I imagine that Paxolnaz with my body would be even stronger.

  The Mask nodded, uncertain.

  So it’s more important than ever that we work together. You need to help me with my aims, rather than working against me. You know that I do not care about them as much as you do, I cannot hide that from you. But I know that I need you, and you know this too. Seeing them dying to the Dark or some other danger does not benefit me. But I need to do whatever I can to survive, to Control the Dark, and to avoid falling into the True Demon’s clutches. That won’t happen if you acting against me, if we are divided…

  The Mask’s steps slowed. It’d never thought about things like that. But how can I trust you?

  I created you. I don’t always understand why, exactly, but I want to be more human. To be a Better Man… at least to some degree. You are a part of me.

  The Mask looked up, after Jo. It nodded. Together, then.

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