Chapter 311

  Murder-Phonics 101

  So, what do you do when you have a desperate plea from a enormously tall murder bot wishing to come with you to non-murder land?

  Well simply put, you apparently let him join you, knowing that this might be a way for us all to learn to trust the murder bots a bit more.

  That and the fact that I was offered a ton of golden karma threads by doing this, made this exchange seem worthwhile to me.

  I don’t know why I suddenly liked Karmic threads so much, but they seemed to be important. Last time I was close to zero or seemingly out entirely was when I was sucked away to the void realm and that is an event and place, I would greatly like to avoid again in the future.

  That is why, even though this is clearly an imposition to me, I took it.

  Also, I figured it would be easier to completely avoid Rob, well Robi’dob’dob the knob, if I was showing around a murder bot to our community at World’s End.

  “Thank you for this,” the murder bot began.

  “Nonsense,” I reply in both the odd Mana Language of the Teleiotís and the standard language of the continent. The reason I can say this is simple, for the forms of communication require two entirely different sets of communication.

  “Besides, this is not all altruism on my part,” I continued.

  “It’s not?”

  “No, with you I can help teach mana control to my students. In fact, you might be the starter language teacher to help students understand Mana usage and control,” I answered honestly.

  “Wait, how?”

  That’s when I try to explain the thoughts that are running through my head, currently.

  “Mana Language requires the use of sensing mana and its precise usage around you. Replying back requires equally clear and concise control over your mana, in the way that you try to respond. Basically, it is a perfect training language for fledgling mages needing to learn control and finesse of their mana.”

  “Huh,” is all the Teleiotís can respond.

  “Come on, no time to dilly-dally,” I reply moving this murder bot to a private area of the grounds. I know that he will likely be safe on the school campus, as that is generally considered my area. But I can’t be entirely certain. This is why I come up with an idea on the fly.

  “Hey, what is your name?” I ask as the two of us come to a complete stop. I know, right after I tell him that we cannot waste time, this ones on me.

  “I had a name, but it was later rejected. Now all I see are odd alien symbols for my name,” he responded.

  Hearing this, I felt the hairs on the back of my neck arise, as I could all but smell a puzzle quest coming.

  “Oh, can you please draw them?”

  “Okay,” the killer robot replied as he then began drawing symbols that looked like an oval next to a triangle that then bisected a square, and so on. He was about halfway through his name, when I recognized the pattern.

  “Those are glyphs!” I exclaimed. Not just any glyphs, as these were the same Ancient Elven glyphs that made up most of the hidden and underground buildings that made up the sublayer of our city.

  Seeing them, I had a myriad of other thoughts go through my mind. Like, did all Teleiotís have similar names? If so, were they meant to be a hint for the Teleiotís to eventually come here and help us excavate deeper?

  Also, did this mean that ancient elven spirits could be reborn into killer robots?

  So many questions raced through my head.

  Everything was great, until I realized one glaring issue with this being the same written language as the ancient elves.

  It meant that once again Rahul De’Failitas would likely be able to provide key insights and clarity into some of the findings. I needed to get that walking inferno factory out of the school. It’s my own fault, try to be lazy, to delegate, to let others take on some of the burden. Next thing you know, you get Liches influencing bad love stories that will burn your house down if you write the love runes as specified.

  Speaking of which, I still need to check to see how Mallory’s quest is going on that.

  Then thinking of quests, I realize that without some incentive, students might not want to study. Or learn from the one Teleiotís who has come to apparently try to learn from our school, or maybe just be separated from the other murder bots.

  Honestly, it is a hard luck story that I can get behind. Not wanting to murder, going against the grain of your base race and impulses, it takes a level of commitment that might be hard for others to understand.

  As a fellow pacifist, or person who went against the ingrained nature of their initial race, I can commend this Teleiotís.

  A Teleiotís that can’t even seem to pronounce their own name.

  Then looking at the name or grouping of symbols I realize two things. First this person had the really bad fortune of having one of those names. You know, the names that stand out and while completely different, you can’t help but be reminded of other people from history.

  This would be the same thing of being called Robert Bouchey, or Richard James, or any of the other tragically close but slightly different names in history.

  In this case, this particular Teleiotís’s real name seemed to be close to a famously bad sports figure from the Olympics.

  “Oh, I see, was your regressor surname Gunn?” I ask, trying to find out the confusion with the elven symbols that have been spliced together.

  “Close, it was Gunnr, which is Scottish for to battle,” the Teleiotís states.

  Hearing that, I wince as I can’t help but feel the connection coming.

  “First name Ray?” I press.

  “Yes, well Raymond to be precise, but it said I could not be that, even after I pressed for it,” he continued.

  “Let me guess, you also said you were a dancer of some kind?”

  Unauthorized duplication: this tale has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

  “Yes, I did note one of my favorite pastimes was dancing,” the Teleiotís, one former Raymond Gunnr noted.

  I just shook my head, realizing that I found out a bit more about the layout of the system. Or at least I think I understand a bit more about the methodology and seemingly random placement of people and randomly selected races.

  Apparently, if the system thinks you are making fun of people and list your hobby as dancing, they will make it so the most likely dance you can do is the robot.

  That or maybe this is just me projecting my own thoughts here. Regardless, the name and similarities to the defamed Olympian and Raymond’s current situation are sadly similar.

  “Well, on the bright side, I think I know what your true Teleiotís name is,” I respond, trying to give the good news.

  “That’s great, what does that mean?” The Teleiotís asks, while pointing to the glyphs written on the ground.

  “Your name is Raygunnr, all one word.” I respond.

  For a moment the dancing Teleiotís ponders for a moment, but then shrugs off the statement. “Oh, that isn’t so bad.”

  Exhale.

  With his seeming acceptance of the name, I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding. This is good, because now I don’t need to be the bearer of bad news.

  “No, no it’s not. Also, to help you communicate with others, I am going to set you up.” I respond, quickly shifting the subject away from the poor naming convention of parents and onto more jovial tasks, like forcing people to make friends. Or at the very least, forcing people to make acquaintances with a seemingly docile murder bot.

  “Oh, that’s great, but how?” The Teleiotís, Raygunnr, asks.

  “Simple, I’ll do the same thing I did for my kids to get the dogs to like them,” I reply.

  “What’s that?”

  “Cover them in peanut butter and set them all loose in the backyard.” I just stand there waiting for some type of response, but all he does is just stare at me with those expressionless mechanical eyes of his.

  “Wait, you did that?”

  “No,” I responded, and he instantly relaxes slightly. Seeing that he knows I was just joking, I go in for the kill, “they had nut allergies, I had to use jam instead.”

  This wasn't necessarily a lie, as those kids did wear their food every time they went out to the yard. Also, little Jackie eventually developed a rash, but nothing life threatening, still makes for a good punchline, or at least it should.

  However, Raygunnr just stared at me like I’ve suddenly grown two heads both speaking different languages. Then I realize, it might be that the Mana Language that the Teleiotís use might not translate jokes well?

  I don't know.

  Regardless it is getting awkward even for my standards, so that is when I just go through with my two-part plan for forced integration between the Midnight Hunters and the Teleiotís.

  With that quest created, I feel like we have a legitimate way to improve our school’s status and hopefully help it get accredited faster.

  I also think that by many of my mages and enchanters being forced to focus on understanding the microbursts of mana that the Teleiotís use, it will ultimately help them be better mages.

  Currently, I don’t think there is any downside to this plan. Well other than us being the first empire to fully try to reach out and integrate with the near two-story tall murder bots. For as dangerous as this world can be, having friends that are designed to kill isn’t necessarily a bad thing.

  This also brings me to my way of getting the students to learn from Raygunnr.

  With that in mind, I focus on the tasks and give a provincial wide quest reward.

  With that quest, I see the value that the world placed on the skills I have long since maxed out to my new limit of 250, that is Polyglot and Arcane Understanding. Then again with four Simulacrums able to practice and share their experiences with me, increasing those skills is relatively easy.

  Thanks to those two skills, I was easily able to learn how to communicate with the Teleiotís.

  This also means that new skills will be available to my students. I can almost sense a new degree path forming, but I don’t want to get too ahead of myself just yet.

  “There, now plenty of people will hopefully want to play with you,” I tell Raygunnr.

  “Hopefully?”

  “Yeah, I don’t know if getting enrolled automatically into SVC is necessarily a reward, but definitely worth posting. If worse comes to worse, we might be able to apply a monetary reward as well, or in lieu of acceptance,” I present, wondering if I need to amend the quest for Midnight Hunters.

  “Okay,” Raygunnr responds, before pausing for a second and finally asking a question that was clearly bothering him. “Also, what is SVC?”

  Hearing that, I paused, but then realize he likely had anywhere from a month or more of waiting to join here and might have missed the announcements. Also, not truly being a Midnight Hunter, or depending on his socio-economic status before joining, he might not have had a chance to hear about our small college. In a way, it is almost like someone asking about a series that you know and have read inside and out, and this new person comes along and has no clue.

  “It’s a community college that we are trying to get accredited,” I reply honestly.

  “Oh,” was all he replied.

  BLUR!

  I am about to go on, but I stop myself as a person I kind of expected to be here earlier finally starts to appear.

  Though honestly, I think she has gotten slow now that she is a grandma.

  WHOOSH!

  In a blur, or near blur at least, Mallory seems to appear from a short-range Teleport. Of course, it isn’t a Teleport, but rather a quick microburst of near-Qi movements that have been enhanced over time.

  That or, is she finally infusing Qi into her enhanced movements?

  Seeing the difference in speed and reaction, I realize this is exactly what is happening.

  Of course, it is causing a slight misfiring of her typical Abilities that she has been using to this point. But in the long run this will be far better for her.

  Still, with this sudden change and her body seeming to be unable to produce the same quality of Qi in controlled sustained bursts, it causes her to be just slow enough that I can easily avoid her outstretched arms.

  Swoosh.

  As she passes by, I feel the intense pull of air, but a few quick flutters of my wings and I am up and away.

  “Get back here,” Mallory all but demands, a playful smile to her lips.

  “What, why?” I ask.

  “Come on, you are just in time,” Mallory responds.

  “In time for what?”

  “For your Bloodline Evolution Class,” Mallory spits out.

  Suddenly I realize why it likely took Mallory a moment to get here, she was clearly in the middle of a lesson when she found out I got back.

  “Let me guess, Gwen ratted me out?” I ask, figuring she had to be relatively nearby and instigating this whole mess.

  “Yes, but she had to help your husband get acclimated,”

  GAG!

  “BLEH! Sorry, I just felt something awful get caught in my throat,” I responded, while pointing to my throat. It was a lie, or at least a near lie, one that instantly seemed to cause an immediate karmic reaction.

  “Do you need assistance?” Raygunnr asks in that nearly creepy way that only a two story tall mechanical lurking death machine could ask. As he spoke he raised one hand up for assistance, as if I needed to be swatted on the back by a two ton killer bot.

  “AHHH!” Mallory responds, jumping in fright at the giant mechanical killing machine that for all intents and purposes just appeared out of nowhere to Mallory, who seemed to only have a one-track mind while chasing after me.

  Death Scythe.

  With a reflex honed by decades of reflex and killing intent, Mallory summoned her ephemeral Death Scythe, and focused her Killing Intent directly at Raygunnr.

  Seeing that she was able to manifest the Killing Intent so quickly, I couldn’t help but be excited.

  Clap, clap, clap.

  “Oh that is a great job, I’m so proud of you,” I respond as I move myself in between Raygunnr and my nearly overly violent Guild Master.

  Hearing me, Mallory pauses as she stares from the giant metal monster behind me, then back to me.

  “It with you?” Mallory asks, obviously referring to Raygunnr.

  “Yes, this is Raygunnr,” I state gesturing over my shoulder to the giant metal monster.

  “The Australian Dancer?” Mallory responds, her mind instantly making the same connection I did.

  “No, but I do think he was marked as a potential problem after he noted dance as a hobby,” I reply.

  “What, I love to dance,” Raygunnr replied, irritated and seeming to cut in as I was still speaking in both languages concurrently.

  “I know, it’s just the fact that you could come across as being a troll,” I respond delicately.

  “I still don’t get it,” he responded sardonically.

  “I know sweetheart, it’s okay,” I respond and gently pat the big machine on the chest.

  Seeing my interaction with the killing machine, Mallory just stares at me out of the corner of her eye for a second.

  “Are you purposefully mocking him?” Mallory finally asked.

  “I don’t think so, I just can’t help myself sometimes,” I reply honestly.

  With that Mallory just stares at him, wondering if Raygunnr will act differently, after hearing my confession. She waited for an awkward moment before finally deciding to introduce herself.

  “Hey big guy, welcome to the Midnight Hunters Guild, I’m the Guild Master Mallory Valhalla, a pleasure to meet you, and you are?” Mallory stated, taking a step to the side and extending her hand.

  Raygunnr for his part just stared at her like she was crazy. Or maybe that is the default setting of all robots?

  “Oh, he can’t understand you, until you learn to speak in Teleiotís,” I reply.

  “Yeah I saw that, what is the skill Arcane Understanding?” She asked, clearly trying to understand the Midnight Hunter Guild quest that appeared for every member of the guild.

  “It’s,” I begin, but then pause trying to put it into words. “I mean it’s just understanding how Arcane energies work in the world around you. In this case, it is being able to identify the microbursts of mana that the Teleiotís use to speak with each other, and obviously us…” I correct myself at the end.

  “Obviously,” Mallory replies, condensation dripping in her voice.

  “Look, I can’t help it that you can’t understand mana, yet,” I replied.

  At that, Mallory paused, “do you think it’s wise?”

  “What’s wise?”

  “Allowing anyone to gain access to SVC? Won’t that throw off your fewer students per class demands that you had?” Mallory quipped.

  I want to argue with her, that it is unfair to use my own arguments against me. But I stop myself, realizing that part of me might have changed while I was gone, and stuck in captivity for a month.

  I kind of even missed teaching, yeah definitely not going to say that out loud, but I did miss learning from my students and seeing their growth, and the look of amazement when they learned something new about magic.

  That’s when I hit her with my own logic.

  “Look, if they are willing to learn not one but two different but highly intensive skills to just gain admittance to SVC, then they should be rewarded. Also, I fail to see how teaching someone who can sense microbursts of mana would be tougher than a student who can barely sense the mana flowing through their own body,” I reply.

  Hearing that Mallory seems to mull it over while nodding her head in agreement.

  Then after a point, she seems to dismiss whatever argument was forming in her mind. That’s when she hits me with the low blow.

  “Okay, now that the easy part is over. Where should we let your husband stay?”

  And like that, I realize avoiding touch acts in life, will apparently cost you ten times as much, later on.