Our party surged forward, closing in on the biome. Whatever was in the distance, they were closing in on us, though it was still hard to say what exactly ‘they’ were. They looked to be short and numerous, but not large at least. They seemed to be roughly the same size as the Mole Orcs we fought yesterday, but I couldn’t sure yet.

  “What are these? They look really funny!”

  “I don’t know! But they look pretty cute, right?” Crudia said, laughing as she easily kept pace with me. God, both of them seemed to actually be running slower than they could on purpose.

  “You can see them?” Dusk asked, surprised.

  “Oh yeah! Only a little though!” Crudia smiled, and upped her pace, finally making distance between me and her. This was unacceptable. A king should not be outpaced so easily. I would have to look into getting a dexterity item of some sorts, that was certain.

  The minutes dragged on, and we finally neared the biome enough to actually see more clearly. What stood in front of us were actual mushroom people. They had no face, just a mushroom cap placed atop a mushroom stalk decorated by thick legs and arms. They were half as tall as I was, but even stockier than the Mole Orcs or the humans in the city. What was it with the gods’ obsession with making the creatures of this world so stocky?

  Their homes were mushrooms too, glowing all the colors of rainbow in a low, bioluminescent color that added to the ambiance of the forest that stretched in front of us.

  “Yes!” Mark exclaimed with a fist bump.

  A human acting weird again. Color me surprised. “What? You’re happy about us fighting shrooms? They don’t even have meat that we can eat!”

  “Their bodies are alchemical components, Shrimpie! You can make so many potion types from just the caps. This is a stroke of luck, I guarantee you.”

  I looked at the black grass that blended into the blue one as the trees and mushroom houses started, and then looked at the mushroom people approaching us. There must have been about fifty of them at least, but they were slow at least. “At least we have a fight at our hands, that’s for sure. So that’s nifty I suppose.”

  “What are we doing? The formation we tested?” Asked Dusk, already stepping behind my left flank.

  I laughed. What a wonderful day. This would just be an appetizer , of course, but the thought of fighting just set my body alive like nothing else did. And the thought of loot and a new skill only pulled me more than anything else did.

  They were mere seconds away, their… voices? were already audible. If they spoke a language though, it was a weird one. Their voices mixed into one from the sheer amount of them, but I could hear some gibberish here and there.

  I used [Analyze] on the one that was mere five steps away.

  The Clobber minion

  Creature

  Level 13

  Did you know that the Fungi are actually the dominant species on most planets? Yes, fungi! Not animals or plants, it’s almost always fungi. These things are so vastly overpowered that they’ve crept into the top spot on most planets they appear in. That doesn’t exclude Earth, by the way, but the fungi on your homeworld are fairly easy to get along with.

  Now, that doesn’t happen everywhere. And these little fellas are just the first floor variants of what fungi can do. These little guys are adorable, right? Don’t get fooled by their cute caps, though. They are very territorial, and like Player flesh as much as the citizens of USA like Fentanyl.

  Actually, that comparison might be even more on point than you might think. Your bodies serve as a happiness drug for these folks, bringing them closer to an eternal (or actually not that eternal, since it lasts like 5 minutes) state of bliss like nothing else does. Their preferred way of consuming flesh includes, but is not limited to; pounding the flesh into mush and then sitting in the carcass and absorbing as much biomass as they can.

  We’re sure that you didn’t expect your Mushroom pasta to fight back, huh?

  Sighing and completely ignoring the little useful info, I summoned my shields and readied myself to block the attacks.

  If you discover this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.

  With a wide swing, one tried to punch at my legs, the punch coming faster than their waddling would suggest. I blocked it, and the punch almost pushed me back from the sheer force. God, that was stronger than I thought it would be. My muscles strained to actually not move with the punch, and I swung one of them at the cap of the thing in turn.

  The blunt edge of my shield embedded itself into the cap, sinking deep into the head, breaking a few chunks off with a crunch. As strong as the punch was, though, it didn’t seem to affect the little guy much. Even its HP went down less than I thought it would.

  And then the mass of them was at us. Another swing aimed at my legs from a newcomer, and I hurried to move it away and punch myself, just to be rewarded by a punch from the first Clobber that I didn’t quite finish off.

  That shit hurt. I felt a bone strain against the pressure, already feeling my muscles protesting against the damage. These guys were not to be underestimated. I grinned. Now this was a fight worth fighting. No dirty tricks, no magic. Just a fight of who could punch better.

  I kicked out, my leg catching the stubby legs of the Clobber that punched me, sending his tiny body falling to the ground with a thud. He even made a sound in his language, though what he said was lost on me. Parts of his legs chipped off, but I couldn’t take advantage of the fall.

  When one fell, three others were already there to fill the gap. Crudia and Dusk did their best to cover the flanks and not let any of them surround us, but soon enough we were completely surrounded, fighting back to back. I didn’t dare say a word, which would cause me to look away from the threat in front of me. These monsters were not stupid, and they would use any advantage I gave them.

  I punched, again, again, and again. The chunks of Clobbers continued falling away, chipping at their HP in large portions, but they were seriously hard to obliterate completely. Mark and Talisha tried giving us some advice on how to fight, but we simply didn’t have a chance to listen to what they said. A moment of not paying attention would mean losing concentration, and that could be deadly.

  Another punch. A Clobber fell back, his HP almost gone. Another. I bumped my back into Dusk’s and hurried to make some distance. Another. A Clobber slipped under the shield, the attack just a bit too slow. I hurried to block the incoming attack that I could see coming from a mile away, just to get hit by a fist I did not see coming in turn. My knee got hit once, twice, and shattered.

  Pain exploded across my leg, making me burst into tears that I fought to swipe away as I fell to the ground. The Clobbers had no face, no eyes that I could see, but I could imagine them getting happy as I fell. I took a potion, but my position was bad enough already. Closing in, another punched at my face as I hurried to block.

  This was bad. They were swarming us, and unlike the Carp men, these guys were actually strong. I couldn’t even get up! Every time I tried to do so, another Clobber stepped in to try to punch my face in, forcing me to remain on my knees, hurrying to block one attack after another. The potion was almost done healing my knees, yet there were so many opponents that my HP was depleting anyway.

  As another attack hit me in the chest after slipping through my block, I felt something rise in me, something primal, a feeling that blocked out the pain almost completely.

  [Vibrant rage - activated]

  Oh boy. I felt as if I was built anew. The pain receded, replaced by strength that wasn’t there before, something explosive and untamable. I punched into another Clobber that still thought that I was an easy picking, and his body flew in all directions, shattered.

  Now this was what I called a skill!

  I went on the offensive now, still careful to keep close to Crudia and Dusk, but more aggressive, more in their ‘face’. My body shined, the colors of my skin seeping into the surrounding area. I wasn’t sure whether I liked it or not. I could already see the disco-ball joke from Mark that would surely come later.

  I stopped my thoughts, and fully gave myself to the fight, ignoring all of my human instincts to overthink. Those would not help me here at all. What would help me was what was already inside me before I got into this tournament.

  My love of fighting.

  For every punch that hit me, I dealt three of my own. For every unblocked attack, I blocked five others. I didn’t use skills. I had no time to think of when and how to use them. I just let my fists, my most trusted companions, guide me.

  I looked back for a second, risking my life to see how my companions were doing. Dusk was bleeding, but standing straight, his eyes focused. Crudia was battered even worse than I was, however. She was panting, one hand limp, her eyes wide with fear and desperation. But she fought on, dodging attacks and hurling herself at enemies whenever there was an opportunity.

  A punch to my waist brought me back to my own fight. I repaid this Clobber too, of course. And was about to repay his buddy too, but that’s when I noticed an odd Clobber, at the back of the crowd. He was holding a staff, mumbling something in that weird language of the Mushroom people.

  I finally noticed that Mark was shouting something about the Clobber that I was looking at, still inaudible through the voices of the Clobbers. Why not just text me if it was crucial to our victory? Breathing out, I used [Analyze].

  Clobber Conju-

  But I didn’t get to see the rest. The world shifted around me in an instant, and I found myself staring at a surrounding area that was completely different from the one I’ve just been in moments ago.

  A cave swallowed me whole, decorated by mushrooms that shone a blue, luminescent light. The air felt different, and I could see nobody around me. The fight was over.

  And I didn’t even get to know the result.

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