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Chapter 79: I Will Survive Without You

  Calvin Baird watched the Barn Fire from the other side of the street, looking into the wide windows at the Dance. Though there was a lot to see, pretty girls and magical lights, he was only really interested in one dancing witch within. He could see the sunny delight on her face and the joy in her magical signature. In a Resolute state, he could see all the wonder and romance of the dance. It started to make him sick as he resigned himself not to enter the Grand Chapel.

  A part of him knew he looked foolish; standing in the light of the streetlamp in his best clothes, looking in on the crowd of happy couples. His shoulders dropped a bit. It was a stupid idea to try and dance with her. She was having the time of her life, he could see it. He would only introduce complication and frustration. Calvin couldn’t help but look at her. Even though she was not smiling at him, it brought a feeling of content to see her so happy. He felt that all was right with the world, her world. He loved Elise, but he could see that his place was not with her.

  The Superior at Emerald Lake was right, there was no peace for Calvin with them.

  He turned away and started off down the road, the frown growing across his lips. Elise was happy, that would have to be enough for him. He cared about John too. It was evident to him that things were beginning to shake out for the two of them. There was no room for Calvin to butt in, he would rather be in love with Elise from a distance. These were the rickety supports which held up his optimism. He was too wrapped up in his thoughts to notice the Six-Gun walking in the opposite direction, coming from Foreman Rand’s office.

  Only when the two passed did Calvin notice the triangle pattern on the Gun’s poncho. It brought to his mind a frayed memory, almost lost to time. He recognized the poncho. Calvin stopped walking, searching his memory for answers. He heard the footfalls stop behind him. The two Guns stood with their backs to each other, each one standing just outside the light of the streetlamp between them.

  Calvin Baird trembled a bit as he realized who was standing behind him. A flood of thoughts drowned out the picture of Elise pinned into his mind; questions, pleas, demands. His breath became shaky as he stood up straighter. He had spent the last four years thinking of what he would say in this moment.

  A sour feeling hit his gut. The burden of survival, the harshness of his life at the Sanctuary, and his feelings of shame and inadequacy had overcome any courage he had. Calvin was broken, he was unable to find any words. He was too young and too wounded to initiate a meaningful dialogue with his father. Though he stood only a few feet from Billy Baird, he was an eternity away. Calvin screamed in his mind, spurring himself to open his mouth and say something, anything. In the end he didn’t have the voice for it.

  The elder Baird did not turn around and embrace him. He didn’t offer a single word. He stood there for a moment with his back to his son, waiting to see if Calvin had anything to say. With the silence unbroken, he started again down the road. The tapping of his boots on the street faded as he pressed on.

  Calvin lifted his head, letting out a long breath. Somewhere deep down, he knew it would be like this. He set his shoulders back and started off down the street. His Resolve did the talking, painting the currents with one message from deep within Calvin’s core.

  A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.

  I will survive without you.

  This was Calvin Baird’s open heart, his spirit laid bare in his Resolve. It was a message to his father, to the witches, to everybody. He would survive without them all. Billy felt it as he walked away. He never dropped that smug grin, it only grew wider. Over the years he had heard a lot about Cal, had read the boy’s many letters. But secondhand testimony and words on a page only offered so much. To Billy Baird, Resolve was the only way to truly know a person. And here on the night of the Barn Fire dance, Calvin’s lonely Resolve told him what he needed to know about his son.

  He could never trust the things Louey or Logan said about Calvin, but he trusted the boy’s Resolve. He believed every word. His statement to Elise had proven itself; today was not the day for them to talk. He had only half believed himself when he said it would come. Stepping down the road, with his son walking the other way, he fully believed that day was on the calendar. He was curious to see what this boy would become by then.

  Another had seen the message written in Calvin’s Resolve. As he walked down the road, Calvin felt a hand pat his back. He jumped, having not registered any footsteps behind him. Whoever touched him had come from nowhere. His eyes darted over to see Foreman Rand standing there.

  “Mister Foreman.” He blinked, “How are you, sir?”

  “Just peachy.” The Foreman’s fuzzy mustache shifted with his smile, “How come you’re not at the dance with the others?”

  The Sanctuary’s Foreman had caught little interaction between father and son. Things didn’t happen in the streets of his Sanctuary without him knowing. After spending the evening with the elder of the two, he wondered if something like that would come to pass. He found himself disappointed in Billy. Calvin was a teenager, a lonely one at that. Rand knew that he wouldn’t be able to express himself fully. But there was no excuse for Billy, who by Rand’s appraisal should have already welcomed his son into the Posse. As powerful a sorcerer as he was, Rand thought, there were still areas where he was weak.

  “No date.” Calvin sounded a little deflated, “Girl I wanted to ask was already going with someone else.”

  “Worst feeling, ain’t it?” Rand’s gaze softened. He knew full well that this was not nearly the biggest thing on Calvin’s mind.

  Calvin let out a sigh, as if to affirm the statement.

  “You know, I didn’t meet my wife until I was thirty-three years old.” Rand chuckled, “There’s always time, kid.”

  “I get it, I do.” Calvin wanted to tell him that future sounded bleak to him. To be alone for so long, and it really seemed like SO long, it was a horrible look into his future.

  It was clear to Rand that Calvin had a hard time with his feelings. He didn’t expect a late-night heart-to-heart conversation with the boy who couldn’t even open up to his own father. He was still looking to help the brave young man, and his mind looked through possible ways to do so. One idea came to him, poking at his sensibilities as a Diamond.

  “Hey kiddo.” He smirked, “You been learning from Hearts like the Bootknife, and the old man on the mountain.”

  “You know about that, huh?” Calvin rubbed his neck.

  “I do. And I think it’s great. But how about I show you a trick right out of the Diamond playbook?”

  “You mean, like a Resolve spell?” This immediately piqued Calvin’s interest as a sorcerer and a card-carrying Club.

  Rand nodded, “I can teach you a valuable technique, for your exam next month. What do you say?”

  “You think I’m gonna say no to a special lesson from the Foreman?” Calvin’s eyes shone brightly with excitement.

  “Well when you put it that way, I suppose it’s a no-brainer.” Rand laughed a bit, “Come on into my office, Baird.”

  Deadeye Rand wore a smirk of his own. He knew that Billy would be watching the exam on Hallows Eve. The Southpaw made like he had no interest in the matter, but Rand had known too many Guns to be fooled by the tough guy act. Billy Baird would be there, he would be watching his son. Rand figured he would give the smug sorcerer a show.

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