About an hour after Kabuto left there was a stir in the marketplace. One of the fried fish salesmen ran past yelling that the tyrant had been spotted headed this way.

  I saw a few people pack up their carts and leave the marketplace. Others just shuttered doors and put out signs saying “closed for lunch.” The sun was still several hours from being directly overhead. So something was going on.

  I wasn’t too worried. I couldn't recall anything in Naruto lore about a tyrant, so it shouldn’t be that big of a deal. Also some prime stall locations have just opened up. Might as well take advantage and get a less fragrant space.

  I set up the cart and prepared to serve ramen. I didn't sell much coffee, so I put the grounds and machine into storage.

  The ramen broth was almost ready. A few more minutes and it should be perfect. Yes, I cheated a little bit with some stock seasonings and some bone broth I made from some pork like monster an adventurer sold me on some generic fantasy world a few hops ago.

  The first batch of noodles are in the pot. I’m ready to serve some ramen. I opened the lid and just savored the smell of the broth. I purchased a bottle of black garlic oil from the shop and set it on the counter. It had been redressed in a painted gourd just like the rest of my condiments while in Konoha.

  Just in time too. Looks like someone is approaching the cart with a hungry look on their face.

  —

  Noa was walking through the merchant district’s narrow streets. It was a quiet day, with almost no foot traffic. Merchants on both sides retreated into their shops the moment they sensed him approaching.

  Noa, on the other hand, snorted. “Greedy merchants who only think of their profit and not the struggles of the working class. Hmph.”

  Then he smelled something delicious. It was out of this world, or at least that was what his intuition told him. He approached the source of the smell and found a food cart standing there, with a merchant radiating a pleasant demeanor and sunshine, which immediately put Noa on guard.

  He approached, and the merchant offered right away, “Young man, care to taste some amazing ramen?”

  Noa narrowed his eyes before asking the most important question. “How much?”

  The merchant replied cheerfully, “Six hundred ryo only. Much cheaper than all the restaurants in town and the tastiest.”

  Noa narrowed his eyes, imitating a battle aura as he began, “Cheaper than most merchants? I have eaten at shops that sold it for three hundred ryo.”

  Of course, Noa forgot to mention that it had no add-ons and tasted like shoelaces, but if Noa found a low price once, he considered that the standard no matter what difference in quality there was.

  The merchant’s eyebrow twitched. “Are you sure it was good ramen? Or did it cause you some trouble later in the day?”

  A bead of sweat appeared on Noa’s forehead as he remembered almost destroying the poor toilet later that day, but with no shame, he replied, “It was yummy and caused no such trouble.”

  The merchant scanned Noa carefully, deciding that he was definitely lying, and sighed. “How about this? This bowl is free.”

  Noa freaked out. “A merchant giving their merchandise for free? Old man, you are suspicious. Are you a spy?”

  The merchant’s eye twitched, his pleasant demeanor tested and not surviving as he shouted back, “You brat. If you don’t like it, go away and eat that three hundred ryo ramen.”

  You could be reading stolen content. Head to Royal Road for the genuine story.

  Noa’s face crumbled in pain at the memory. “I will take it for one ryo,” he replied. “That way you cannot say I owe you anything.”

  The merchant was even more irritated. However, he relented, wanting to get rid of this kid before he committed a crime, and served the ramen to Noa, who inhaled it immediately with an appetite worthy of a Akimichi.

  Noa then burped contentedly and wiped his mouth. “Well, that was delicious,” he said, nodding in approval. “I will take ten more. And since you sold it to me for one ryo, that clearly means this is the official price from now on and for all eternity, so out of the goodness of my heart I will generously give you eleven ryo.”

  “If all a young ninja like yourself can afford is eleven ryo, perhaps I should set aside this broth that I spent all morning on. No, all the care and work I spent seasoning the broth would just be wasted on a youth that swallows without tasting. For your insulting price I should just give you instant ramen instead. Not that you would know the difference. What do you say, full regular price for a decent bowl, or an insulting price for a struggle meal special? Throw in an extra ryo and I’ll add an egg.”

  “Half regular price.”

  “No, But I will discount the good ramen from six hundred, to five hundred ninety nine.”

  “That’s not a discount. I’m not paying that.”

  “It is, technically. You already know how good my ramen is. It’s worth the money. However, you are a ninja, that means you do missions for payment. If you bring me a fancy display tray for food samples, I will pay you with three meals of whatever I am making that day.”

  “Nah, it's good ramen, but I'm busy. I’ll take another bowl for a Ryo though.”

  “Not gonna happen.”

  —---

  That child negotiated like my mother in law. I’ve seen her bring seasoned merchants to tears. I feel like if I didn’t put my guard up he would have walked away owning my cart.

  My neighboring shopkeepers all came back from hiding. The fabric merchant next door came up and slapped me on the back.

  “Whoah ho, looks like someone survived the tyrant! It only cost you a bowl of your ramen. That soup must be good, I’ve been smelling the broth all morning. How about I pay the same price as the kid? I have a Ryo right here.”

  “If you can find five hundred and ninety nine more of that Ryo’s friends I’ll make you a bowl of the good stuff. You try to play games, I'll give you the cheap noodles I threatened the kid with.”

  “All right all right, here’s your money, give me a bowl.”

  “These noodles are great! Just out of curiosity, what do your cheap ones taste like?”

  I pulled a 25 cent packet of ramen from the system store. Then I put them in a bowl with water and set them in the cart’s microwave. The microwave was hidden from view of all customers, but the cart’s magic had camouflaged all the electronic screens with wooden knobs and painted seals. Two minutes later, I tore the spice packet, dumped it in, and swirled with the disposable chopsticks.

  I had to stop myself from sneering at the low quality dish. I had survived on it for weeks on end in college. The first years of our marriage instant ramen kept us full when we had little else.

  I handed the man the warm bowl, he took a few bites, and thoughtfully paused.

  “You know, this isn’t that bad. It's not your good stuff and I wouldn’t pay more than one hundred fifty Ryo for a bowl, but I’ve had worse. I saw you take the noodles out of a shiny paper package. Were those dried noodles? How long do they keep? Would you be open to selling a few to use as road rations?”

  “I actually don’t have too many of those instant noodles, but I could sell you a box of twelve for thirteen hundred Ryo.”

  “Do those little spice packets come with?”

  “They do.”

  “Deal.”

  I purchased a twelve pack from Cart-mazon. This time the ramen packages were not plastic but butcher paper and twine. The instructions were written in ink on a tag. I was charged a 10% fee for a non-cart related purchase. I really didn't make any money on the deal. That cloth merchant did bring a few of the other merchants over to have some of the good stuff, and I ended up selling out before mid afternoon.

  I saved a bowl in storage in case Naruto showed up, but that didn't happen. Overall still a great day. The system's countdown timer lets me know I will be hopping out of here about midnight.

  I've got a moderately large pile of Ryo burning a hole in my pocket. It's time to so some sightseeing and souvenir shopping.