“And push.” I do. I cry but I'm finally here. It hurts but it's good. I didn't fail. I won't fail. “Come on Cea, just a few more times.”

  -----

  “Today we are learning how to do aura sensing, Cea. Are you excited?”

  I nod my silver pig tails bobbing. Daddy was beaming. Mother was still tired.

  “Now no guessing. Who's aura are you standing in?”

  An oppressive aura pushes down on me. Is it daddy or mother? She is looking out the window. I frown.

  “It's daddy.”

  I didn't get the skill today. Daddy looks annoyed at mother. There will be yelling again tonight.

  -----

  This is a daily reminder: You have 384 unallocated stat points

  Five years leading up to it. She denied me the birth of my child. All my suffering and I was at the crux and then…an early childhood memory of being a disappointment. I grab the tether. Ready to find out if the child lived. Stop it.

  I'm breathing heavily, my body sweating. I almost tried to force more of her into me. Is she planning this or did she just not want to give up that memory. I don't know. It was precious to me…her. I get up and sit at the mirror. I see her. She is smiling at me, a knowing smile. I blink. It's just me. My eyes have bags under them. I used to sleep for three hours. Now eight isn't enough.

  Jessica performs her duties, her hands handling the coldness of my body better. It was only five years this time. Perhaps Cea has lost more undead. At the very least my breath isn't frosting the air. I get up and head out.

  -----

  Another crowd, and more murmurs of Demon and devourer. It's the dirt trial this time.

  “Not sure why we are bothering.” I huff out.

  “You were the one who elicited this from the Queen. Don't scorn me for following through on your secured demands.” She says without looking at me.

  “I apologize for speaking out of turn, [Lady] Ophelia.”

  Another participant walks up. They form dirt constructs and place them into the hand of the proctor. Each time the Drakenoid proctor shatters it in their hand. A name given and off they go. I shrug and head to the stage. The murmurs grow.

  My turn comes and I walk to the Drakenoid, they give me a raised eyebrow ridge. I put my hand forward. The palm bulges out and then rips. A dirt construct falls out onto his hand.

  Soul lowered to 526

  He keeps looking at me as the hand heals up.

  “Having strong internal control means nothing if you have yet to progress into external.” He says as he places the construct down. Not even bothering to test the density.

  I shrug, “Apologies for wasting your time then.”

  I walk by him. He looked at me curious and then his eyes drifted back to the construct. I made my way back to Ophelia.

  “How exactly has the construct not dissipated yet?” I simply stare at her. She doesn't ask again. “I am unsure of what your goal was there.”

  “To at least try. I wanted to go to Gotsdam because of a promise I made.”

  We begin walking.

  “What will you do if they don't accept you?”

  “Can I try next year?” Clearly there are those older than fifteen walking onto the stage.

  “It is possible, but I doubt the Queen will wait before giving you duties to attend to.”

  “The wastes of Sanguine.”

  “Here I was hoping you would stay in the capital. You already have a steward for your lands.”

  I give her an annoyed look, “I need to heal the lands from what I have done.”

  “Is that within your ability?”

  I look at her then to a building with a bit of ivy. I walk up and touch it. The plant changes. It blooms a rose that I pluck off and hand to her.

  “You hadn’t channeled mana to do that.”

  I shrug, “It always feels like I am part of it as I change them. It still has to be within my mana aura.”

  “It would seem not all your abilities are disclosed on your [Status Screen].”

  The author's narrative has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

  “You already knew that.”

  -----

  The interrogation room door closes. It's just me and the man. What once was brown peppered with greys was now the opposite, grey with only scant brown. He looks up at me with hollow eyes. I had set this man free by killing Anvar. It is my duty to hear his crimes. To get his confession.

  “Name.”

  “I have none.”

  I put my hand onto his manacled ones.

  “Sir, it's only the start. Tell me what your name used to be.”

  “Randan.”

  Guess he used his real name in the camp. I wrote it down.

  “Age?”

  “I don't remember.”

  He doesn't. I sigh.

  “You're a smart man Randan, you can do math. Addition, subtraction. Ask your voice what your soul and level is?”

  There is a pause, a grimace. “Fifty-seven.”

  “Good, good. Simple. Level?”

  “Forty-one.”

  I twitch at that, Vanessa was right. I shake my head, no time for errant memories.

  “How much do you remember before arriving in Yetna?”

  “Nothing.”

  His heart seizes for a moment. No. I seized his heart for a moment because of his lie. It then heals. He begins breathing hard.

  “I'll give you a moment.” When his breathing steadies, “How much do you remember before arriving in Yetna?”

  “Only the last ten years.” I snap a finger. He grunts, “How…” The finger resets.

  “A finger for misleading me, your heart for a lie. Now I assume you can remember ten years ago clearly, but beyond that you still have bits you held on to. Important bits. For blackmail. Yes?”

  Silence. I slowly crushed his hand. He screamed and tore his throat but I simply healed it so he could continue. Through it all he finally said, “Yes.” The hand was restored, I continued.

  “Silence is a hand crush. Forgot to tell you…but I guess you figured it out. Now I'm going to start saying names and you are going to tell me two numbers. How many times they sought your services and how many you sold them. Can you handle that?” He answers with silence again. I answer with another hand crush. When he acquiesced, I started. “Anvar.”

  “Four…thirty-five to forty.”

  I wrote it down. Asshole, doesn't remember exactly. I look at the list Ophelia handed me. We go down the noble names. Then I ask him if he remembers any others. He was doing so well. I seized his heart.

  “Come now, you have more names.”

  “Bradford Xavious, one, ten.”

  I wrote it down. Was this her test? To see if I would shield those I know?

  “Any others?”

  “Maxwell, seven, a hundred and forty.”

  Damn you great grandfather. Did grandmother know? I wrote it down. The list was exhaustive.

  “You went and got caught trying to blackmail a noble family. They turned you in over trying to kill you. They didn't believe you when you told them their mother paid for their first few levels. I have to ask, was making soup every day really that terrible?”

  “I deserve to be more than the community kitchen.” I snap a finger, “I…I stopped forgetting. I was going to find a new mental mage to remove the rest of my memories.”

  “Which you needed money for?”

  “Yes.”

  I left the room. She was waiting there. I handed her the papers. She read through it.

  “You left him alive.” Was all she said. A statement, not an accusation.

  “The man can't live with what he has done. It seems wrong to allow him peace.” I walk past her towards her office. She follows. I open the door and walk to her box of awful. I see the necklace and put it over my head and under my robe.

  “Sara…”

  You have gained [Resist Void] Basic 5

  Gain 2 exp

  It sinks into my chest a bit. Reaches my sternum and stops. It's excruciating. I deserve it. I go into the box for more. She catches my wrist. I look at her.

  “You’re upset, it's hard finding out your—”

  “Let me stop you there, I already knew. Anvar reached out to a trusted merchant on how to level his children quickly. A mentor he could trust.”

  “Yet you killed Anvar and not your great grandfather.”

  “Going by the list, there wouldn't be many nobility left if I started killing them all for their involvement.”

  “So you don't plan to kill Maxwell.”

  “No, I don't plan to. Would I if I was in a room with him, alone? I don't know. I didn't kill Randan.”

  “You judged him to be suffering, killing him would be a mercy in your eyes.” Her words held no judgement. An interrogation for an interrogation. I even have the torture implements on myself.

  “True. You have the list, [Head Inquisitor]. The Queendom will decide whether to ignore it or do something about it.”

  You have gained [Resist Void] Basic 6

  Gain 2 exp

  I look at the other notification.

  [Junior Inquisitor] has become [Inquisitor]

  You have gained the title Inquisitor

  Inquisitor - You tortured a man to learn what he knew. You did only what was necessary for the information. Or so you tell yourself. Gain Three additional Strength, Three additional Constitution and Three additional Mental Fortitude when leveling up.

  “And should she decide to burn the list?”

  “Then I would be disappointed at her lack of foresight for not at least using it for blackmail herself.”

  A smirk, “That wasn't what I was asking.”

  “I am not going on a killing spree, Ophelia.”

  “I have clothing on this time, Sara.”

  “You questioned my loyalty, after I just proved it. I'm just answering rudeness with rudeness.”

  “You also are currently trying to void yourself.”

  “Seems the appropriate response. Don't act as if you haven't done the same. I can see the scars you left on yourself. Your blood moves awkwardly in those places. Are the trinkets incapable of hurting you anymore?”

  Her eyes narrow, “Careful Sara, you might try to send a girl to her death for things she may do in the future.”

  Would it be a mercy to do so? Thinking it, I find the piece she had not said the previous night. That fundamentally she saw pain in my future. Perhaps in her own as well should she run into me again. She spoke again, worsening my mood.

  “Why did you use violence? I've heard that other voice you used. It has the ability to mesmerize as does your blood mana sight.”

  “I wanted him to be lucid. To remember that he told me these things. Using mesmerizing abilities would mentally break him down. The goal was information not to punish him.”

  “You didn't tell him who you were.”

  “I wasn't there for myself but for the Queendom.” She is satisfied with that.

  “I have had the merchant brought in. The one whose ledgers you cross referenced. Go get her confession.” She said with a bit of disinterest.

  -----

  I laid in my borrowed bed. I had done as she had asked of me. The woman had never hurt anyone. Certainly not me. But I had hurt her. For the Queendom. She was haughty and full of herself. She had looked at me with disdain. At least until I broke a finger.

  I tried to only do terrible things to terrible people but this was for tax evasion. Crossing lines I didn't know were there until I saw them when I looked back. I huff out a breath.

  My coldness has steadily warmed. I don't feel as if I deserved it. I feel something pop inside me. Dozens more follow. So many. How many eggs had they laid inside me. I giggle and squirm as they spread. My own personal hell. I love them all. They sip my blood but nothing else. I don't bar them from any part of my body. Half of me once feared becoming a spider pi?ata. Now I hope they lay even more eggs inside me.