The adventurer rubbed her eyes as she woke up. She blinked at me, rubbing her eyes again. Then she scurried away, drawing her sword. “What… who are you?!”.
“My name is Count Boogula”, I reintroduced myself. “Sorry for trying to scare you, I just wanted to see what you could do after you killed those slimes so easily!”.
“...You’re not trying to possess me? Or eat my soul?”, she slowly lowered her sword, but was still tensed up.
“Good heavens, no! That kind of magic is strictly forbidden. Besides, why would I want that? Your bodies are like Rube Goldberg machines, only grosser. …No offense, of course!”. I felt the sweat beginning to roll down my face, and had to remind myself that ghosts can’t sweat.
Was talking to people always this hard? I had loads of conversations with my undead coworkers at the old haunted house, since we didn’t get too many guests. As far as actual humans went… well, I’d mostly just scared them. Casual conversations were a big mood killer.
“Well, I guess I should introduce myself, Mister… Boogula”, the adventurer said, slowly sheathing her sword. “My name is Phoebe Darkbane III, C-ranked adventurer. …Are you really a friendly ghost? I’ve never heard of such a thing”.
“Most ghosts are friendly! What, did you think we were all soul sucking monsters?”, I joked. “Yes”, she replied bluntly.
“Such… such slander! I’ll have you know we ghosts have lived for hundreds of years! We are masters of politeness and decorum! Only a few of us hold murderous grudges!”.
“...Well, you did just create the illusion of some terrifying wasteland in my head…”.
I couldn’t decide which was a greater affront, the idea that a harmless prank was a crime on par with murder, or the dismissal of my [Spooky Maze] as an ‘illusion’. But before I could interject, she continued.
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“Besides, I come from a family of ghost hunters! We deal with wayward spirits and such, so I’ve only seen the bad ones, I guess”.
“Oh, so that’s why your last name’s ‘Darkbane’! I guess there were two ‘Phoebe Darkbane’s before you, huh? Your family must have quite a history”.
“Actually, um”, she blushed. “...Our family name is officially ‘Darkbane III’. Somebody thought it sounded cool, I guess…”.
My mouth opened in shock. Such genius! And here I thought ghosts were the master of making up cool fake titles to impress people. We still had much to learn! “So… if you were actually the third Phoebe, your name would be Phoebe the third… the third?!”.
Her face reddened further. No wonder. With a name like Phoebe Darkbane III III, you’d be the envy of all monster hunters, a hero praised by every bard across the land. I’d need to see about a name change soon. The world would soon tremble in fear of Count Boogula XIII III.
“Oh! Amazing names aside, I’m also an adventurer!”, I waved my tail, with the copper ring on it. “I’m new so I’m still only F-ranked. Any tips from a veteran adventurer?”.
“Make sure to pack and budget for rations and travel expenses. People think monsters are bad, but most adventurers are felled by economics. You shell out gold like you’re on vacation forever, and the places you have to stay at…”, she shuddered. Then she looked at me, as if suddenly realizing I was a ghost again.
“...I wonder why you don’t just hire the undead to do this job”, I wondered aloud. “Just get an army of zombies and have them take care of it. I’ve known a few, they’re very hard workers!”.
She only gave a weak smile in response. “...Aside from that, maps are really handy. Getting lost in a dungeon or cave is another common fate… although I guess you could just phase through the walls though, hmm…”, she furrowed her brow in thought. “I guess it is handy being a ghost”.
“Yep! Even though I don’t have any hands! Before you become a ghost though, you have to be a zombie first. It takes years to get used to your own stench. Then you turn into a skeleton and spend all your time piecing your own body back together… It’s a rough journey to ghosthood”.
“I… see. What would you think about maybe forming an adventuring party with me? You seem like you’d be really helpful to have as a teammate with your illusions and ghostly stuff, honestly. I could do the fighting and show you around, and we could take on higher ranked quests too”.
“Really? I’d love to! Having a travelling buddy sounds great!”.
This way I can also keep an eye on you, Phoebe thought to herself.