Ember stops halfway down the hallway from Ishaza’s rooms out to the gardens, looking back over her shoulder towards her teacher’s office. She leans back against the wall and lets out a long breath. The st of the aphrodisiac dose for today fades in her stomach, leaving her wrung out and exhausted.

  Maeve meets Ember’s eyes through her silver gsses, and stops in the hallway next to her. She doesn’t say a word, just raises an eyebrow.

  “I’m sorry,” Ember says. “You were right, I shouldn’t have teased you during your control training. It was unkind of me, and when I tried it myself I couldn’t manage it. Not only that, but I went and got you involved in this whole mess…”

  Maeve shakes her head. “Like I said, I was the one who proposed the bet. I’m just as guilty as you.” She looks back down the hallway towards Ishaza’s office. “Still… I’m gd you’ve learned your lesson. We’re all in this together: we should have each other’s backs, not be bickering about this thing or that.”

  Maeve crosses her arms and looks Ember dead in the eye. “You’re not just saying that because you lost the bet, right?”

  Ember shakes her head. “No, I — I meant what I said to Ishaza. This is on me, I wasn’t taking my studies seriously and that got everyone into trouble.”

  Maeve studies Ember’s face for a long moment, then nods. “I believe you. I was worried for a moment that all three of us would be out of the program over this…” The corner of her mouth twists wryly. “Ishaza’s pretty reasonable though. Take your second training program seriously and you shouldn’t have problems.”

  Ember nods. “Speaking of which — Camellia mentioned that you were better than her at dealing with consequence meditations. Would you be willing to… help me out a little with those? It’s clear I need them.”

  Maeve nods. “For sure. I don’t actually want you to flunk the program.” She extends a hand. “Friends?”

  Ember takes a deep breath, reaches out, and csps Maeve’s hand. “Friends.”

  They shake on it.

  Not a moment ter, Fianna pops her unfairly pretty face out of Ishaza’s office and waves. Ember waves back, and Fianna comes over, her uniform skirt swishing along the hall.

  “What are you two talking about?” she asks.

  Ember looks over at Maeve. “Making up, I guess,” she says. “I wanted to apologize for getting you two into this.”

  Fianna waves the apology away, shaking her head. “I got involved because I wanted to be,” she says. “It was just too tempting of a target. And I have to admit I went and talked to you in the first pce just so I could set up for this, so…” She rubs the back of her head. “It’s really me who should be apologizing for lying to you.”

  Ember’s eyebrows jump. “Wow, was your opinion of me that low?”

  Fianna ducks her head. “A little. I still think your sex cafe pn is silly and impractical. But I can see your drive now, and that counts for something.”

  Ember sighs. “It’s not a sex cafe.”

  “We’re just going to have to agree to disagree on that one,” Fianna says. “But still. Friends?”

  “Yeah.” Ember smiles. “Friends.”

  “What are we going to tell Camellia?” Maeve pipes up. “I think she’s been in the library this whole time.”

  Ember’s face falls. Fuck, Camellia. She’d been pnning to maybe have some kind of date with her tomorrow… Fat chance that she’d be able to do that with the extra week of control training she’s just been assigned. Not only that, Camellia warned her and she just blew it off completely…

  “I’ll talk to Camellia,” Ember says.

  “Alright,” Maeve says. She gestures to Fianna. “Let’s get back to the dorms, then, and you can go see if you can find your… friend.” She fshes a knowing smile at Ember.

  Ember just shakes her head. If Maeve thinks she can rattle her by implying Camellia’s her girlfriend, she’s wrong.

  “See you for lessons in an hour or so,” she says to Maeve. “Till then, try and rex.”

  “Of course,” Maeve replies. “See you then.” She takes Fianna by the hand, and heads off down the hall.

  Ember watches them go, then turns around and heads towards the library. If she’s lucky, she’ll be able to catch Camellia alone.

  ~*~

  Camellia is standing high on her tiptoes to reach a high shelf in one of the library’s teak bookcases when Ember sees her. Coming down to the fts of her feet with a genealogy of historical courtesans in one hand, she gnces over, sees Ember, and smiles slightly.

  “Came looking for me?” she asks quietly.

  Ember nods, not quite able to meet Camellia’s eyes.

  Camellia’s face goes serious. “I take it it’s not good news, then.”

  Ember shakes her head. “No. I… Maeve executed a cunning trap, got me to have sex with her and Fianna, and then Ishaza came in on us. We were all almost expelled.”

  Camellia sighs. “I can’t say I didn’t warn you. What did you expect, not focusing on your control drills and doing kissing practice instead?” The corner of her lip quirks up. “Do I get to say I told you so?”

  “You definitely get to say ‘I told you so’,” Ember replies. “I’m sorry, I should have listened. From the beginning, when you said that it was foolish and unkind to tease Maeve. But I didn’t, and, well…” She sighs. “Can you forgive me?”

  “Of course,” Camellia says. “Though I imagine this means our date is canceled. Ishaza probably has you repeating your control training, doesn’t she?”

  Ember just nods, not trusting her voice.

  “Yeah. She did something simir for Maeve.” Camellia gives Ember a wry smile and pats her on the shoulder. “Stop looking like a wet cat. You learned your lesson and that’s what counts. We’ll get through this together.”

  Ember lets out a breath. “You’re not angry?”

  “A little disappointed, maybe,” Camellia says. “But to be honest, it was pretty clear how this was going to go. You needed help even before the bet got started, so…” She shrugs and looks down at the book in her hands. “I hoped you’d do well. But I didn’t really expect you to.”

  Ember winces. Coming from Camellia, that says it all. Was she really that out of control all along…?

  “Do you think I could have managed it, if I hadn’t… messed up at the end?”

  “I think you could’ve,” Camellia says. “But that’s not what counts in the real world. What matters is what you actually do.”

  Ember looks away. “I…”

  Camellia steps in and touches Ember’s chin, turning her head back towards her. “That’s what matters now, too,” she says. “Sure, you made a mistake. What are you going to do about it?”

  Ember nudges Camellia’s hand aside and lets out a pained ugh. “Yeah. I get it. I’ve already scheduled a training session with Maeve. We made up. But still…”

  “It’ll be okay,” Camellia says. “I believe you can do it, now that you see a little clearer. Just… remember how it felt for Ishaza to step into the room when you were having sex with Maeve. That’ll keep you on the right path.”

  Ember nods. “Yeah. I’ll try my best.”

  “Now, I guess I have more studying to do,” Camellia says. “And so do you. Go get to it, alright?”

  Ember nods, takes a breath, and goes.

  ~*~

  The lessons with Maeve are almost disappointingly simple.

  “There’s nothing complex about it,” Maeve says, tapping her foot against the base of the fountain’s rim. “You just make a chart with the benefits and consequences of the choice written out in full. So, taking a completely theoretical example, if you have sex you shouldn’t, you get to have some fun and it feels really good. But in exchange you risk being thrown out of the entire program, losing your shot at immortality, or worse, being kindled and then going feral afterwards. Whereas if you don’t have unapproved sex, you miss out on some pleasure, but you get access to all the guild’s resources eventually and you get to live forever. It’s not really a hard calcution. It’s just hard to remember and act on it at the moment you need it.”

  Ember nods from where she sits on the stone pza. “And then you drill the chart?”

  “Yep.” Maeve nods firmly. “You practice it until it rests here.” She presses two fingers to her sternum through her dress shirt. “Just behind your breastbone, up near your heart. You drill it and you drill it. If you have to, you take a parchment copy of your list with you everywhere you go so you can refer to it. See the reality written out in stark ink. And eventually, after you do it enough times, you internalize the choice you want, and then it stops feeling so tempting in the first pce.”

  “I thought it’d be more complex.”

  Maeve shakes her head. “It’s not complex at all. In fact, it’s good that it’s simple: the simpler it is the better the tool is, working on this level where you try and interrupt the urge. It’s hard to remember complex tools when you’re horny out of your mind!” She cracks a smile.

  Ember smiles back. “Then I think I can do it,” she says. “Camellia said you were better at this than her, though. Why is she worse at it than you?”

  Maeve frowns. “The problem is that Camellia… likes to pretend that you get nothing by giving in. But for this tool to work well, you have to be painstakingly honest about the benefits as well as the drawbacks. You have to really feel that you’ve weighed the decision and committed to it. Otherwise it won’t stick.”

  Ember nods. “Alright.” She takes a breath. “Let’s get a chart written, then.”

  “Good on you.” Maeve smiles. “I’ll help you drill it aloud if you want. Just to make sure you repeat it enough times.”

  “Sure.”

  Ember picks up her pen, and sets to work.